Are Women Friends Important ?: Let’s Celebrate International Women’s Day!

Larada Horner-Miller

2 months ago

How important are women friends to you? That’s has been rolling around in my head all day as I get notifications on my phone that today is International Women’s Day! Here’s what I think!

My Role Model for Women Friends

My whole life my mom had women friends that she counted on. At first, there was Mokey McMillan, the wife of my dad’s best friend, Roy McMillan. Moving out to a small ranching community, Mokey welcomed her as a newlywed and helped her learn the ropes in a small tight-knit community.

Later, Helen Waldroup became one of the women Mom confided in—a best friend. They worked side-by-side at many events in Branson. They gave each other perms and spent hours together, just visiting. I watched this relationship and marveled.

As Mom grew older, Betty Clark and Rose Ward were women she depended on. Betty lived across the street, so they visited each other easily, sharing recipes and kitchen ingredients when needed. Rose sat on the porch with Mom, drinking beer or Tequila Rose and toasting people as they drove by. She kept up friendships to the end.

When her dear sister, Willa Urbanoski, moved closer to her, they became inseparable, enjoying trips to town to shop or times together laughing and reminiscing about their earlier lives.

Mom showed me her whole life the value of women friends.

Growing Up in a Small Community

As a child and young adult, I had girlfriends who hold special places in my memory. Kay McMillan and I were the two girls in our four-person class. We started kindergarten together and went on to share a room for the first semester of our freshman year at Trinidad State Junior College.

I would also add Kay’s sister, Mona, and Jill Clark to my list of girlfriends in my growing up years. But I also had other girlfriends: Janie Gilstrap, Audrey Green and Georgia Anne Doherty. And one of my original girlfriends was my first cousin Joanne Doherty who I spent many holidays and family gatherings with!

Beauty Salon Women Friends

When I moved to Loveland, Colorado in the mid-70s, these women beauticians welcomed me into the beauty salon world there: Barb Long and her daughter, Cindy. Cindy became my party-partner during a crazy time of my life, but she accepted me totally.

At the University at 28, I Needed A Girlfriend

When I went to the university at 28 years old, Eloise Keeney became a mainstay after a tumultuous divorce. We both were English majors and met in the computer lab for the English department where we worked. I laughed at our size difference: she was near six feet tall; me a short five foot three. Her hilarious humor kept me going through this major life change.

My Move to Albuquerque—Teacher Women Friends

Rhonda Sandoval, my teammate at Washington Middle School, has stayed one of the key women in my life since 1991. Also, Rebecca Betzen! We taught together and have been life-long friends! In fact, we had lunch last Thursday with Rhonda’s mother to keep in touch after my move.

Rhonda has gone through the loss of my parents with me; Rebecca, the loss of my mom. In fact, these two women appeared surprisingly at my mom’s funeral in Trinidad, Colorado —about 200 miles from Albuquerque. That’s the kind of women they are and the friendship we have.

My Wedding to Lin & My Women Friends

When Lin and I married, our wedding was totally unconventional. He had two best men! I had eleven women stand up with me: Lynn Hafer, Nora Creed, Freddie Franks, Mary Jo Smith, Christy Ortega, Rhonda Sandoval, Rebecca Betzen, Sheri Pastian, Cecilia Pounds, Lorraine Hogan and Carolyn Schaeffer.

All of these women played an important role in my life over the years through traveling, square dancing, teaching and recovery.

I Met With Two More Women Last Week

Last week, I met with two of students from Raton Middle School who are now in their late 40s—I call them my “Raton Girls.” I taught them in the eighth grade, and we have stayed connected over the years. These two younger women bless me so! What beautiful women they have grown up to be—giving back to the community through their jobs and their lives!

Finally,

Today’s the day to celebrate the women in your life. What a delightful time I’ve had looking at my history of women friends. How rich and what a blessing they all have been! Take a moment to cherish those special relationships you have right now!

If you don’t have one woman you can call right now, make that a priority for this next year and check in with me!