family · Holidays · Memories · Mom · My Thoughts

A Peaceful 4th of July

Lin's luscious garden - a peaceful 4th of July

I enjoyed a peaceful 4th of July morning this year, sitting in Lin’s luscious garden doing my daily Quiet Time which includes Julia Cameron’s practice of “Morning Pages”—three handwritten pages of what’s going on in my life. Then I joined online an international meditation group I belong to and enjoyed an inspirational poem, “Lady Liberty,” then twenty minutes of meditation and then an opportunity to list three ways I saw God working in my life during the last twenty-four hours.

Peaceful, calm! For sure! Normally, I sunbath, starting in May, but I’ve had some health issues the last couple years and haven’t, so I decided it was time to enjoy the sun again. I donned my patriotic two piece red, white and blue bathing suit and soaked up the sun.

For lunch, Lin grilled hot dogs, then we drove to Albuquerque to drop by garden club friends of ours and enjoyed a lively conversation there and a lovely garden full of blooming lilies. This gardener has been one of Lin’s mentors over the years.

For the evening, we had decided a couple days ahead of time we would watch the movie, “Oppenheimer.” In May, I heard the co-author of the book, Kai Bird, talk at the Santa Fe International Literary Festival. His comments ignited my interest, so I bought the book there. Then in the last month, the movie came up on Prime, so we decided to watch it.

Peaceful, calm—it wasn’t! What a sad, horrible treatment of a man who should have been deemed a national hero but the insane “Red Scare” and McCarthyism grilled and grilled him. Watching his metamorphoses, he had to deal with what he had done by being the “Father of the Atomic Bomb.”

“. . .after World War II, Oppenheimer lobbied vigorously for international control of atomic energy, proposing that the Soviet Union and the United States submit to a supranational organization designed to allow sharing of peaceful atomic energy information while keeping weapons development to a monitored minimum.”

https://www.atomicarchive.com/history/hydrogen-bomb/page-15.html 

At the end, both Lin and I felt he got the raw end of the deal. Robert Downey Junior played Lewis Strauss superbly and won an Oscar for his performance. At first, I didn’t want to believe him as a villain because I like him so much, but in the end Downey Junior had us cheering when he lost his appointment he sought to be in Eisenhower’s cabinet.

So, no fireworks—no outlandish party with insane behavior! Just a mindful consideration of a piece of our country’s sad history.

When we were younger, I anticipated the first fireworks of the evening: sparklers that we could draw figure eights in the black sky around us. Then all the families in our little country town pooled their money and bought fireworks for us to enjoy, mostly bottle rockets in the 50s. But they lit up the sky and thrilled the gathered celebrants and me! It seemed magical.

As a child on this celebratory day, I focused on fireworks—Black Cat firecrackers my uncle and aunt brought from New Mexico to us in Colorado because they were illegal there, not peaceful! It fact, that was the farthest thing from my mind—I wanted explosions, noise, family around and fireworks.

Many years, our family and friends gathered and picnicked at the Folsom Falls during the day. I always wore my tennis shoes in the water because of the crawdads. I knew they’d bite my toes. Then we returned home for our firework display.

Cuchara, Colorado on the 4th of July - peaceful
Cuchara, Colorado on the 4th of July

Later over the years, Mom, my brother and I went to Cuchara, Colorado for the 4th of July, a small town in southern Colorado that celebrates this day with a short parade, live music with lots of families and dogs (the Dog Bar encourages people to bring their dogs.). What a cool respite on a hot July day.

First, it was Mom, my brother and I who enjoyed this mountain retreat, starting 2010—cooler weather, fun people and great music. We had so much fun the first time with some rowdy Texan women dancing in the Dog Bar, we had to go back the next year.

Larada playing putt-putt golf - peaceful
Larada playing putt-putt golf

After Mom died, my brother, Lin and I kept up the tradition of going to Cuchara, playing putt-putt golf and dancing at the Dog Bar.

Lin and I at Cuchara, Colorado - peaceful
Lin and I at Cuchara, Colorado

Then my brother’s youngest daughter and her family joined us there. We played putt-putt golf and enjoyed the mountain getaway.

My niece and I all dressed up for the 4th of July - peaceful
My niece and I all dressed up for the 4th of July

In 2018, we moved this celebration to Red River, New Mexico and found out they had more fun activities for my niece’s two young sons. We also had the privilege of attending a Michael Martin Murphy dance/concert at the Mother Lode bar.

Michael Martin Murphy at the Mother Lode - peaceful
Michael Martin Murphy at the Mother Lode

As for so many, the pandemic changed everything, so we stayed away from the mountain resorts where there would be a lot of people gathering. In 2021, my brother’s two daughters brought their families to Branson, Colorado and we went out on the ranch and shot off our fireworks.

Fireworks on our ranch - peaceful
Fireworks on our ranch

For the last couple years, Lin and I have stayed home—peaceful and calm. But I still remember those family-filled holidays with loved ones and am thankful for the memories.

This 4th of July in Lin’s garden and being with him felt good—the right way to celebrate this patriotic day. Peaceful and calm has become something I enjoy these days.

How about you? What did you do for this holiday?


Buy My Audio Books:

This Tumbleweed Landed

This Tumbleweed Landed audiobook cover - peaceful

Let Me Tell You a Story 

Let Me Tell You a Story audiobook cover - peaceful

Hair on Fire: A Heartwarming & Humorous Memoir Audiobook

Hair on Fire: A Heartwarming & Humorous Christmas Memoir audiobook cover - peaceful


Enjoy my interview on the podcast, The Writing Table


family · Memories · Mom · My Thoughts

Memorial Day, 2024—My Childhood Traditions of Decorating Graves

Gravestones - Memorial Day

We will celebrate Memorial Day, 2024 tomorrow. This year I plan to send time with my brother, but as a child, we had a tradition.

However today, some Americans seem confused about Memorial Day and Veterans Day.

“Memorial Day and Veterans Day are both patriotic holidays honoring the military, but there is a significant difference between the two aside from when they land on the calendar.

Memorial Day, which falls on the last Monday in May, honors the men and women who died while serving in the military. This solemn occasion is a time to reflect on these American patriots who made the ultimate sacrifice while protecting and defending the country they deeply loved. Veterans Day, observed every November 11, recognizes all who have served in the Armed Forces.”

https://www.hfotusa.org/difference-memorial-day-veterans-day/

Many Americans see Memorial Day as the first holiday of the summer—a barbecue and maybe some family time and a day off from work but not a thought about the men and women who have died serving in the military. How about you? Did you know that?

During my childhood, I knew “the dead” played a role in this holiday because we often we met my maternal grandparents who lived in Amarillo, Texas, at the cemetery in Des Moines, New Mexico and “decorated” the graves of our family members. But I didn’t know the military aspect of it.

It was a community time with many local people assembling with friends who had moved away. Yes, there was reverence for “decorating” the graves, and the grown-ups enjoyed seeing friends and visiting. As children, we met up with friends and ran around, not really understanding the importance of the day.

Afterwards, Mom, my brother and I would go back to Amarillo with my grandparents as the beginning to our summer fun.

My mom and dad religiously “decorated” the graves of their deceased relatives on Memorial Day. They went to Trinidad where my dad’s side of the family were buried. Then they went to Des Moines, New Mexico to honor Mom’s side of the family. When my dad died, I joined Mom in keeping up these traditions.

After Mom died, I continued the tradition of “decorating” the graves in Trinidad for many years, but I didn’t go on Memorial Day because I live 280 miles away. My cousin agreed to honor our family buried in the Des Moines cemetery.

This afternoon, my brother and I returned from a two-day trip to Cripple Creek, Colorado for his birthday celebration. We gambled and enjoyed each other—a precious relationship I have with my brother!

As we neared Trinidad this afternoon, he asked if I wanted to go by the cemetery, and I answered enthusiastically, “Yes!” This year he “decorated” the graves a week or so ago. I so appreciate him taking on this task.

Mom & Dad's gravestone - Memorial Day
Mom & Dad’s gravestone

When we arrived, I thought, “Here we are again, honoring our deceased relatives like our parents and grandparents taught us.” I took pictures of Mom and Dad’s grave and my brother and I enjoyed simple conversation, silence and reverence.

Then we walked to my Aunt Helen’s grave and my paternal grandparents, commenting on the state of each—Aunt Helen’s stone has tilted over the years and is supposed to get fixed. A small tree has grown besides Granddad Horner’s side of the gravestone and my brother commented about bringing shears to cut it down.

“Decorating” graves, graveyards and Memorial Day—that has been my tradition. We have lost no one in our family in military service, so this day became a day to honor the dead in our family.

Hopefully, if you have lost a family member or friend to military service, today you will take the time to honor them with flowers on their grave, a silent prayer of thanks or whatever ritual you think of for their service. Yes, enjoy your barbecue, your day off, the beginning of summer, but—”lest we forget!”

As a nation, we need to remember these days for what they are—forgetting the meaning of a holiday renders it less than what it is.


Hair on Fire audiobook cover - Memorial Day

Hair on Fire: A Heartwarming & Humorous Christmas Memoir available in audiobook format at the following places:

Enjoy my interview on the podcast, The Writing Table


family · Mom · My Thoughts

Moms Everywhere: Bless You!

Mom & Larada

Bless you, Moms everywhere! This day slows downs, steps aside from the rush and the hurry, and celebrates moms everywhere! You are the backbone of our worlds! I’ve never been a mom, but I marvel at how you do it all: the laundry, the meals, the housecleaning and the job! It’s beyond my comprehension!

So, I want to salute my dear mom once more! I never tire of writing about her. I remember her perky personality and giggles that often caused me to giggle. Then a chain reaction of laughter filled the room. As I wrote this, I pondered her as a young mother, the mother I don’t remember!

How Did You Manage?

How did you manage?

My heart beat next to yours

            For nine months.

I felt what you felt     

            Your loves and fears

                        Ate what you ate

Spicy food often

                        Loved what you loved

                                    Dancing, dancing and Dad!

My world was you!

I always knew you wanted me!

            Never a doubt!

You didn’t know I was a girl

            The daughter that would complete

your family!

Quickly everything changed

            For me!

My comfortable world

            Of warm

                        Fluid

                                    And you!

My birth came

            You square danced the night

                        Before I was born!

                                    Doing what you and Dad loved!

Did you feel any pain

            When Dad twirled you that night?

Did your big belly bounce

            To the beat of the music?

                        Is this why I love to dance?

Was my birth hard?

            You never spoke of the pain

                        Only the glory!

You welcomed me into your family

            A dad who cherished me,

A brother, thirteen months older than me

            A baby himself

            Three half-siblings who saw me

                        As the spoiled baby!

A young mother of twenty-five,

            I wonder how you managed,

                        Me, a new born

                        My brother, so close to my age!

                                    Really two babies!

How did you manage?

Did you have many sleepless nights?

            Did you have arms aching from holding

                        Two sleeping babies?

                                    Did the mounting heap of diapers

                                                Seem to never end?

You never spoke of the responsibility,

                        Only the glory!

You managed

            Like all mothers do!

                        You did what you had to do,

                                    Washed diapers,

                                                Filled bottles with milk.

                                                            You marveled at my

                                                                        Small fingers wrapped

                                                                                    Around yours!

Mother and baby's hand - Mom

And you loved

            Every minute!

Yes, you managed!

            You managed well!

Writing poetry always puts me in another dimension in thinking about a familiar topic. I thought I had written everything there was to say. I have written several poems about mom, an entire book about losing her, yet here, in a fresh moment, these words came.

Finally,

Happy Mother’s Day, Moms—how do you manage it all? You just do it and love every minute.

Celebrate your mom today and remember her on this special day!


News, News, News!

Just Another Square Dance Caller meme - mom
Lounge on the beach with your iPhone and Flippo!

~Get your FREE Fifty minute audio recording of “Highlights of My Conversations with Flippo.” Learn how he started calling, how he recorded “The Auctioneer,” and a bonus: which caller did he sleep with? Click here for easy access!

Grief · Marshall Flippo · Mom · My Books · My Thoughts · Prejudice, Mistreatment, Mexican, immigrant · Ranching · Spirituality · square dance

What Ties My Six Books Together?

Someone holding up things that connect - ties

What Ties My Six Books Together? As I pondered this question this week, I wondered: three books about my rural childhood in southeastern Colorado, one about my grief in losing my parents, one a biography about a square dance caller and the last one about my reaction to the coronavirus pandemic. Then I saw the tie that binds them: relationships and connection to people. So, here’s how I see the tie that ties my writing together:

My First Book

This Tumbleweed Landed book cover

This Tumbleweed Landed, a memoir written in poetry and prose, focuses on people, places and events in my small rural community during my childhood. I fashioned it after Cynthia Rylant’s children’s book, Waiting to Waltz, who wrote poetry about people, places and events in a fictional town. In my book, I celebrated my childhood relationships with many notorious adults in town—Virgie Firestone and the Warners. Also, what I wrote about many of the places and events, places and times I connected with my family and friends—Branson dances and stories my dad and his school years, told sitting at our round table.

My Second Book

When Will Papa Get Home? book cover

When Will Papa Get Home?, a historical fiction, focuses on a Mexican immigrant family’s perilous times during the 20s in southeastern Colorado. Maria, the daughter, tells the story of her family’s plight. She weaves the tale of those people responsible for her papa’s false accusations.

I centered this book on familial and friend relationships and connection to people. Sadly though, this book also shows the prejudice of the time and the misconnection some people had with certain races. But her deep connection with her family wins in the end.

My Third Book

Let Me Tell You a Story book cover

Let Me Tell You a Story, a nonfiction account of how my granddad put our family ranch together during the depression when many other ranchers lost theirs, focuses on the three generations of my family and our ranch. My dad, mom and I had previously released this booklet in 1992 at my dad’s 75th birthday party. It overflows with the relationship between my dad and his dad and my granddad, and the relationship my dad and granddad had with the ranch they loved. Yes, you can have a relationship and connection with the earth! Even though it focuses on the ranch, the underlying topic is our familial relationships.

My Fourth Book

A Time to Grow Up: A Daughter's Grief Memoir

A Time to Grow Up: A Daughter’s Grief Memoir, a memoir about the loss of my parents, shows the foundation of my life and relationships: my parents. Of all my books, this book hurt to write, yet I love it the most! In talking about my loss, I feature the unique relationship I had with each parent. First, I connected with each of them, making it easier to connect with others in the world.

My Fifth Book

Just Another Square Dance Caller: Authorized Biography of Marshall Flippo

Just Another Square Dance Caller: Authorized Biography of Marshall Flippo, a biography of the most famous square dance caller in the world’s, first and foremost highlights relationships and connections with people. Yes, it tells Flippo’s life story from Texas to Japan as a young man and then later in life, but a major part of his life story was his connection with his family and friends. So much so, he required a section in the book telling stories about his square and round dance friends. After fulfilling that request, I connected with callers, cuers and dancers and featured their stories about Flippo. Yes, he truly understood relationships and how to connect with just about anyone.

My Sixth Book

Coronavirus Reflections: Bitter or Better?

Coronavirus Reflections: Bitter or Better?, a spiritual self-help book written in poetry and prose, focuses on many of the perils of the coronavirus pandemic with an underlying theme the opposite of my focus: isolation. Yet this theme emphasized the extreme need I had and many others had to connect with people, to be with people, to relate with people. Thankfully, Zoom met some of those needs—a monthly get-together with two women friends I knew in Loveland, Colorado, a Christmas concert with our local caller, and many recovery meetings. But I’ll never forget the first time I went out without a mask and actually hugged someone besides my husband. Something deep inside me healed.

The lack of connection truly became the hardest part of the pandemic for me, and I see now how that appears throughout this book.

Finally,

This topic came up because I’m a multi-genre author which makes it difficult to market my books, my brand. Current training I’m attending wrestled with this dilemma. But I have no qualms about this! I love poetry and prose. Also I relish historical fiction. Writing Flippo’s biography was a privilege and an honor. I love the variety!

Relationships and connections with people feed my life and my writing. I did not know when I wrote each book that those themes laced their way through each work, hiding in a poem, a story, or my prose. Actually, taking the time to identify the tie between my six books opened my eyes! I’m so glad I wrote this blog to see the common tie that binds my work together. I have a feeling this meandering around and through my six books will help me in my future writing!

If you’ve read my books, did you see this theme? If not, did you see others? Let me know.


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A wintery day is an invitation to read! meme of five of my books
All available at my website: laradasbooks.com or Amazon.com

~For me, it’s Christmas all year long! Here’s a variety of Christmas greetings from Flippo & Neeca, featuring his song, “When It’s Christmas Time in Texas”: https://youtu.be/mpJCUGffU3A

Coronavirus Reflections: Bitter or Better?
Grab a cup of coffee and enjoy a chapter!

~My new book, Coronavirus Reflections: Bitter or Better? WON the 2022 New Mexico-Arizona Book Awards in the Body, Mind & Spirit Category. Have you bought your copy yet? Vist my website: laradasbooks.com or at Amazon.

Just Another Square Dance Caller: Authorized Biography of Marshall Flippo meme
Baby, it’s cold outside! Read about Flippo inside where it’s warm!

~Have you bought a copy of Flippo’s biography yet? Believe it or not—it’s been three years. Go here for your hardback or paperback: https://www.laradasbooks.com or at Amazon.