I have three aunts in my life who touched me deeply—Dad’s two sisters and Mom’s sister. Each one influenced me in different ways. Meet them here!
Aunt Helen
Aunt Helen and Uncle Gay
Aunt Helen, born October 18, 1919, one year after my dad had a similar close relationship with Dad I have with my brother. We are thirteen months apart.
My brother and Mom have often compared my drive and personality to Aunt Helen. She became a teacher after another career and worked hard to get her master’s degree during the summer for several years.
She lived near Spokane, WA, so I savored those summers because Uncle Gay and she came to Colorado with their twins. Her husband and she went to Alamosa to go to college and left the twins with my grandparents in the town we lived in. Uncle Gay and Aunt Helen visited on the weekends, staying with my grandparents. I idolized her, the way she dressed, her hairstyle and everything about her. A cigarette dangled from her lips often, which was stylish then. I loved having her here for those summer months.
Like her, I changed careers and became a teacher and then got my masters.
Many years passed, and I was fortunate enough at the end of her life to help her and her children. She celebrated holidays with us and my brother’s families, but she was so sick. I helped her and her sons during that time, and always felt it a privilege. Sadly, we lost Aunt Helen at 56 years old, way too young to breathing complications.
Aunt Helen showed me the strength, hard work and determination it took to do what you wanted to do.
Aunt Joan
Aunt Joan
Aunt Joan, born May 29, 1928, joined the Horner family ten years after Dad’s birth. As a young woman, she took to roping and Dad often said she could out rope him any day. When she was the rodeo queen for the Trinidad Rodeo, she did a roping demo before the rodeo that wowed the crowd.
She raised six children and lost one child at birth. Her life centered on her family.
As a child, I interacted little with Aunt Joan because she was busy with her own children, but as an adult, we had many memorable times together. She completely supported my books writing and bought many copies of my books to share with her family.
When she talked to me, she often called me “Rada,” which was a nickname of mine during my childhood—what an endearing act!
In her 90s, Aunt Joan joined us on Zoom during the pandemic and managed it amazingly. She lived a long happy life!
Aunt Joan showed me a genuine delight any time she saw me. I always felt so welcome in her presence.
Aunt Willie
My last picture with Aunt Willie
Aunt Willie, born November 7, 1920, was Mom’s older sister. During my childhood, she and Uncle Hughie lived in Albuquerque, New Mexico (maybe why I ended up there). She retired from Sandia Labs and moved closer to her daughter to Folsom, New Mexico, and lived there for years.
As a child, Uncle Hughie and she spoiled my brother and I—we were her only niece and nephew on her side of the family. Big Kat fireworks for the 4th of July. Many family picnics and times together. They introduced me to fishing, which became a favorite pastime for years!
Again, I was privileged to actively take part in an aunt’s life. At the end of her life, I see her maneuver from this life to the next. I learned from her that assisted living facilities resemble junior high antics. She taught me that a sense of humor doesn’t have to die when you age.
Aunt Willie showed me often her love through words, actions and a twinkle in her eye!
Finally,
My three powerful aunts throughout my life showed me how to be the woman I am today. I feel fortunate to have been so blessed.
Did you have any aunts in your life that touched you? If so, how?
All available at my website: laradasbooks.com or Amazon.com
~For me, it’s Christmas all year long!Here’s a variety of Christmas greetings from Flippo & Neeca, featuring his song, “When It’s Christmas Time in Texas”: https://youtu.be/mpJCUGffU3A
Grab a cup of coffee and enjoy a chapter!
~My new book, Coronavirus Reflections: Bitter or Better? WON the 2022 New Mexico-Arizona Book Awards in the Body, Mind & Spirit Category. Have you bought your copy yet?Vist my website: laradasbooks.com or at Amazon.
A relaxed time with a latte and Flippo!
~Have you bought a copy of Flippo’s biography yet? Believe it or not—it’s been three years. Go here for your hardback or paperback: https://www.laradasbooks.com or at Amazon.
Mom with her Panda hat on!Mom at a Branson-Trinchera Reunion!Mom with horseshoe sunglasses
March—Women’s History Month! Did you know that? What a thrilling discovery! So, over the next four weeks, I plan on celebrating four women in my life and history. Some are dead; some are still alive! It doesn’t matter because they still have had an intact on me!
First, here’s a great resource with pictures from Dr. Carla Hayden, 14th Librarian of Congress to Sojourner Truth, three-quarter length portrait, standing, wearing spectacles, shawl and peaked cap, right hand resting on cane. What a wide variety of pictures of women in our history. Look at: https://womenshistorymonth.gov/about/
Now, more focused for me—where else would I start the celebration of women? My Mom—Elva Marie Dickerson Horner. Celebrating her this month has a poignant ring to it—she died March 23, 2013, ten years ago! In so many ways, that’s hard to believe! It seems longer; yet it seems like yesterday.
On March 23, 2013, at 5:10 pm, Dad and Jesus won—Dad had waited up there for seventeen long years to dance with the love of his life again. Jesus agreed with him, and the pull towards heaven won, and Mom passed from this world to the next.
Let’s Start at the Beginning
Elva Marie Dickerson Horner was born on September 24, 1928 to Virgil and Tresia Dickerson in Des Moines, NM. Mom joined her 9-year-old sister, Willa Lee.
Aunt Willie and Mom
Being the youngest child in the Dickerson home, Willa Lee tells a story about Mom: “when we went to the post office she would lie down on me—on the ground and throw a fit. I reached inside the fence and got me a switch. (Pause) She didn’t do that again.”
Living through the depression, Mom endured a hard life, living in a shack with dirt floors. Grandma would wet the dirt down and pack it hard, and Mom got in trouble for digging little holes afterwards.
Her Marriage and Family Life is Coming!
Mom loved to dance her whole life. A certain cowboy caught her eye at a dance. She noticed his unique dance style. At the Robin Hood Bar in Raton, New Mexico, he crossed the dance floor towards her. She knew he was going to ask her to dance. Then she panicked, and the romance of a lifetime started with Harold Horner, my dad. They dated; they danced!
Dad and Mom on their wedding day
Then, Dad and Mom were married on August 28, 1951 in Raton, New Mexico. Their married life that would span 45 years had begun. Mom immediately became stepmother to three small children and faced the trials of being a stepmom, but the children lived with their mom in Denver. They visited Mom and Dad regularly.
As newlyweds, they moved in with Dad’s parents in Branson, Colorado, and experience a small-town tradition—chevarier. Friends short-sheeted the beds, removed labels off all the canned goods, and Mom, the bride, had a wheelbarrow ride around town. Dad’s parents had the joy (and despair) of sharing this country tradition and all the effects.
Then Dad and Mom bought their own first home from the Stephenson’s a few months later—lock, stock & barrel. After the birth of my brother and me (thirteen months later), Mom’s family was intact! Her family grew with marriages, then nine grandchildren came, and then fifteen great grandchildren. She celebrated each addition to our family, so I witnessed a woman dedicated to her family.
Mom cherished family get-togethers and holidays. Her father-in-law, Laurence, loved to have family get-togethers at our house because of Mom’s cooking and hospitality!
Her Life in The Community
Lots of life happened in Branson through the years. Mom enjoyed not only her own children, but my brother’s and my friends in the community. She was happiest when her kitchen and adjacent dining room were full of young people. Mom maintained close relationships with many of these children into their adulthood.
After Granddad Horner died, Mom became Dad’s right-hand man, able to do anything on the ranch. She worked hard! In fact, in 1989, she fell off of a haystack and broke her wrist when I was teaching in Raton, New Mexico, right before shipping time. So, several rancher’s wives and I stepped in and helped cook and serve the meal to the shipping crew.
As Dad’s health worsened, I watched Mom lovingly cared for him until the end. What an example of dedicated love!
Mom’s Interests
Mom had a variety of interests:
She was an avid sports fan of all Branson sports. When Bub played, she yelled loudly at basketball games, drowning out other parents. For many years, Mom sat in the same place every game with a dear friend.
In the 70s, Mom got interested in genealogy and researched both the Dickerson and Horner sides extensively. In 1999, we traveled to Eastern Europe because of her genealogy interests, looking for connections to her granddad, who immigrated here as a castaway with no records of entry into the US. Today, I cherish her black ledger with all of her records. I joined her in this interest and have entered her data into an app on my computer, Family Tree Maker.
Girlfriends have been a part of Mom’s life forever: Ellen Berry in high school; Clara Warner, Nancy Salas & Mokey McMillan years ago; Helen Waldroup; Betty Clark and Rose Ward.
Learn More About Mom
Mom had an abiding faith and became baptized and a faithful member of the Des Moines, New Mexico Methodist church, attending every Sunday with her niece and her husband. She looked forward to the time after church when a group went to a local restaurant for lunch—and a little gossiping! Her faith lasted until the end.
All of us have evidence of Mom’s beautiful handiworks: afghans, quilts, Christmas ornaments and more.
I remember Mom as quite the prankster—she loved a good practical joke. If you fell asleep at her house in the living room, a good chance you would end up with whipped cream on your nose! That is just one of her many tricks!
Often when I was with Mom, I enjoyed the privilege of hearing her laughter, so rich and inviting, seeing her eyes twinkle and her joy for living.
Mom and I in our matching Christmas Outfits
As you can see, Mom touched my life and many others. She formed me and others to be the women we are today, and I will be forever grateful for my mom! So be sure to celebrate the women in your life this month by doing something special for them.
Mom’s Purple Bear
Recently my husband, Lin, went through our house collecting things for a rummage sale for the Garden Center in Albuquerque. I had a purple bear on the bed in our guest bedroom I gave Mom in her dying days. Somehow the purple bear ended up in a stack of stuffed toys, and he took it to the rummage sale to sell.
Afterwards we were in the guest bedroom, and I looked at bed and realized the purple bear had disappeared. Then I looked at the top of the bookshelf where the other various stuffed toys had ended and they were gone. I realized our house cleaners probably put the bear up with the others innocently.
When I told him where I thought the precious purple bear ended up, he returned to the sale before it started, went through bags and found it. He received cheers from the workers there because he had told them, “I have to save my marriage. I have to find that bear!”
Mom embrace that bear tightly in the hospital after I gave it to her, and we kept it near her until her dying day. Lin blessed my heart with his extreme effort to retrieve it!
Finally,
What women are you celebrating this month? Have you even thought about it? Which woman has influenced you? Why?
All available at my website: laradasbooks.com or Amazon.com
~For me, it’s Christmas all year long!Here’s a variety of Christmas greetings from Flippo & Neeca, featuring his song, “When It’s Christmas Time in Texas”: https://youtu.be/mpJCUGffU3A
Grab a cup of coffee and enjoy a chapter!
~My new book, Coronavirus Reflections: Bitter or Better? WON the 2022 New Mexico-Arizona Book Awards in the Body, Mind & Spirit Category. Have you bought your copy yet?Vist my website: laradasbooks.com or at Amazon.
A relaxed time with a latte and Flippo!
~Have you bought a copy of Flippo’s biography yet? Believe it or not—it’s been three years. Go here for your hardback or paperback: https://www.laradasbooks.com or at Amazon.
I inherited my family home my parents bought in 1967. Now I own it after my mom died in 2013. Is it good or bad?
I just finished cleaning the bathroom in the house I inherited. Mom, Lin and I painted it and put up the trim in 2010. I hear our laughter as we looked and looked for western trim to put up, but couldn’t find any with horses or anything western. We settled for a floral trim. Then the painting took quite a lot of effort because of the high ceilings in there—ladders, stretching and camaraderie. Mom and I worked hard as we measured and cut the trim, yet I remember laughter and lightness in our task.
Because this is a second house, I kept so much of her accents and things—she whispers to me softly anywhere I go in this lovely old house. Good or bad? I feel lucky to still have so much of her with me.
Back to the bathroom—Mom collected frogs, so frogs dance across the top of the cabinet. Another statue sits below on a shelf, a friendly group of frogs shampooing each other’s hair. A frog-etched glass hangs over the door, greeting everyone as they enter.
Mom’s sense-of-humor dons one wall with a couple hangings with funny quips that still make me laugh:
Over the years since she died, I have done a lot of needed remodeling in the bathroom, but I kept up the trim we put up together—nostalgic for sure! However, recently I have looked at the paint color and trim and thought about alternatives, so I see a change in my future.
Traveling through the rest of the house,
Mom continues to speak to me in a variety of places. The year she died, she hung a pillowcase of a picture of my brother, she and me at a San Francisco Giants’ game over her dresser in the bedroom. Mom and I have on panda bear hats which celebrated a Giants’ player then, and my brother bought them for us. Absolute delight shines in all of our eyes! How did she get it up over the dresser in her frail state? I gave it to her for Christmas her last year, and it was a pillowcase—I wanted her to put it on her bed, but she was determined to put it where she wanted it! Good or bad?
I face this picture/pillowcase every night when I go to bed and every morning when I wake up. What a delightful remembrance of such a fun day and my dear mom and brother (and my husband who took the picture)!
As I type this,
I sit at the breakfast bar in the dining room facing the kitchen, where Mom spent most of her time. What a cook she was! After she passed, I thought about remodeling the kitchen and putting in a dishwasher. Yes, she only had a dishwasher for a short time in her long career in the kitchen, and Lin suggested it, seeing how much time I spent in the kitchen washing dishes after family gatherings. As I talked to the remodeler, he easily said something about removing the cabinets. I agreed for the moment.
Then when he left, I opened one cabinet with all her spices lined up and saw her handwriting on the inside of the door and knew I couldn’t do it. So, I bought a portable dishwasher and put down new linoleum as my remodeling for the time being.
Finally,
I inherited our home I lived in from my 7th year of school until now, overflowing with memories of mom and dad. Good or bad? Deeply, I feel how good this is because it is my heritage.
Do you have a connection to a house in your life? A childhood house? Your first home as a young married? Share your experience.
All available at my website: laradasbooks.com or Amazon.com
~For me, it’s Christmas all year long!Here’s a variety of Christmas greetings from Flippo & Neeca, featuring his song, “When It’s Christmas Time in Texas”: https://youtu.be/mpJCUGffU3A
Grab a cup of coffee and enjoy a chapter!
~My new book, Coronavirus Reflections: Bitter or Better? WON the 2022 New Mexico-Arizona Book Awards in the Body, Mind & Spirit Category. Have you bought your copy yet?Vist my website: laradasbooks.com or at Amazon.
Baby, it’s cold outside! Read about Flippo inside where it’s warm!
~Have you bought a copy of Flippo’s biography yet? Believe it or not—it’s been three years. Go here for your hardback or paperback: https://www.laradasbooks.com or at Amazon.
For years, my parents’ death loomed in front of me as they aged. I dreaded losing them and wondered how I would cope. I had intricately woven my life into theirs, never living over four hours away.
It’s been almost ten years since losing Mom and twenty-six in losing Dad. The pain has subsided but never goes away. Here’s how I have coped.
In 2017, a few years after Mom’s death, I wrote a book, A Time to Grow Up: A Daughter’s Grief Memoir, dealing with my grief over the loss of both parents, and how I handled each differently.
These excerpts from my book show the difference in how I handled their two deaths.
Dad and me dancing at his 75th birthday party.
Dad’s Death
“On January 6, 1996, my dad died. Losing my first parent left me reeling. This loss changed my life forever. At Dad’s death, I was eight years sober. I had feared his death for years because of our close relationship. How could I survive without him? I wondered.”
Larada Horner-Miller, A Time to Grow Up: A Daughter’s Grief Memoir, (2017): xvi.
When my dad died, I didn’t write poetry to get clarity, to heal myself, or to see the events of my life as a part of my process. I wrote but not to deal with my loss.
I focused on Mom—that’s what I did, and I danced and worked.
We talked often about Dad, our loss, and our grief. I realized these conversations were important for both of us to heal. I learned that from her and relished her wisdom—I listened. Her tender care of herself demonstrated to me how to do this mysterious thing so many don’t understand how to do: grieve.
Time healed Mom. She managed her grief and lived seventeen years without Dad, in relative comfort and happiness.
I wanted that for myself when she passed.
Larada Horner-Miller, A Time to Grow Up: A Daughter’s Grief Memoir, (2017): 11.
Mom and me in one of our Christmas outfits bought by Dad.
Mom’s Death
On March 23, 2013, Mom died, but this time was different and so very difficult. Both my parents were now gone, and I felt alone, an “adult orphan.” My recovery and faith in my Higher Power helped me survive losing her, but my major relief came through writing—I wrote poetry and lots of it. When I wrote a poem, tears of relief flooded me—a major healing tool. I read them to my therapist, and she cried with me. One particular night, she asked me to publish them so her daughters could read them after she died.
It also helped that I was older and more aware of my personal means of handling life’s hard knocks. I had seventeen more years in recovery and had learned more about grief in watching Mom and how she handled the loss of her beloved husband of forty-three years.
Relief also came from new activities that unfolded in my search for healing and in many familiar activities I had done for years.
Larada Horner-Miller, A Time to Grow Up: A Daughter’s Grief Memoir, (2017): xvii, xviii.
Resources In This Book
As I wrestled with what I wanted to share in this book, my teacher-side came out and I added appendices galore to help the struggling wounded hearts who read this book deal with their grief.
The appendices I included are:
Appendix A—It’s a God thing!
I listed the many God incidents that occurred during those three months from Mom getting sick and dying:
Appendix B—Activities I did
I listed the activities I did after Mom died. Notice I focused on grief, but mostly the activities were a part of my normal life.
Appendix C—Books and websites that were helpful to me
Appendix D—Workbook
Healing from grief requires active participation if you want to get past the pain and the loss to the other side—to thrive more than just survive. I listed a few questions and activities to get the juices flowing after reading this book.
Finally,
In a unique twist, I didn’t write when Dad died—I focused on Mom. I wrote poetry and prose when Mom died. After Mom’s death, the poetry came in torrential waves! With every outpouring, more and more of me healed.
We must face our parents’ death—it is inevitable, but how we handle it is our choice. Originally, the title for this book was “I Grew Up to Be the Woman I Always Wanted to Be,” but that didn’t go with the subject, so I changed it. I wrote a poem with that title and will leave you with it by downloading it. (Download here!)
Have you lost a parent? Both parents? If both, do you feel like an adult orphan? How did you handle the loss?
~I heard yesterday that my new book, Coronavirus Reflections: Bitter or Better? is a finalist in the 2022 New Mexico-Arizona Book Awards in the Body, Mind & Spirit Category. Winners will be announced in a couple of weeks.
~Wish You Were Here: A Novel by Jodi Picoult, one of my favorite authors, deals with the COVID pandemic in fiction as opposed to my nonfiction book. Check it out! Interesting story!
~MY FIRST AUDIOBOOK IS AVAILABLE: Go to Audible to buy my first audiobook, Let Me Tell You a Story. I’m working on Coronavirus Reflections: Bitter or Better? but have gotten stalled with shingles.
~Do you listen to podcasts? Here are three podcasts with interviews about my new book & some Flippo stories:
~Have you bought a copy of Flippo’s biography yet? Believe it or not—it’s been two years. Go here for your hardback or paperback: https://www.laradasbooks.com or at Amazon.
~For me, it’s Christmas all year long! Here’s a variety of Christmas greetings from Flippo & Neeca, featuring his song, “When It’s Christmas Time in Texas”: https://youtu.be/mpJCUGffU3A
Football games andIce cream and delicious desserts!
Last week on Saturday, August 27, 2022, the Branson-Trinchera Reunion saw a rebirth after being canceled for two years because of the pandemic. The creative committee came up with a different format, which attracted younger alumni.
So, this is how the day looked! The celebration started off at Branson’s new amazing football field with two games—first the junior high and then the high school. Many alumni circled the football field to cheer on both teams. We didn’t have football when I was in school. In fact, the football field is where the baseball field used to be!
The senior class manned the concession stand and provided needed refreshments on a hot day. What fun I had talking to old friends in the cafeteria—hugs galore!
After the two school games, there was an alumni flag football game. Several recent graduates stood in front of me and my car during the game, eager to get back on the field. As the high school game drew closer and closer to its finish, they put on their cleats and stretched muscles, ready to get on the field once more. During this game, the festivities began in the gym with an ice cream and dessert social. The committee provided the ice cream; the alumni brought the delicious desserts.
Keeping with tradition, the committee displayed Tom Cummins’ amazing historical photo collection and land plats. Many alumni with their families strolled by the photos, and I heard exclamations and shouts when someone recognized a relative.
The atmosphere of lifelong friendships and storytelling filled the air. What a pleasant experience! We only had a few “ole timers,” but people clustered around them to show their love and respect. The sad truth—we don’t have many “ole timers” left!
Kaylinn Gilstrap, a professional photographer, added an art show to the festivities, with its opening reception on August 13, 2022 from 3:00—6:00 PM and its closing reception coinciding with the reunion from 5:00—7:00 PM. This art show added quite an artistic flair to the traditional reunion. Many people ventured up to the old County Garage building to view the amazing artwork from many local artists and alumni.
I served on this committee for about twenty-five years, and we had seen a major decline in attendance. The “ole timers” were passing away. Many alumni from the 60s, 70s and 80s, for whatever reason, chose not to attend the reunion, and I don’t understand why. I love the fact that we had it this year—maybe different, but we had it.
When I first saw the flyer announcing a change of date and format, I have to admit I was skeptical. I couldn’t see how our elderly alumni could attend the football games, then stay for the social time with ice cream and desserts. I thought it would be too long! It worked!
Finally, it wasn’t the old format, but is that so bad? This innovative committee worked hard to provide the event we all love—a time to get together with family and friends. You can’t beat that.
And now looking towards 2023 and the future. Next year we will celebrate 100 years for the Branson school. What a time to celebrate! (The black-and-white picture is the original Branson School!)
~MY FIRST AUDIOBOOK IS AVAILABLE: Go to Audible to buy my first audiobook, Let Me Tell You a Story. I’m working on Coronavirus Reflections: Bitter or Better? but have gotten stalled with shingles.
~Do you listen to podcasts? Here are three podcasts with interviews about my new book & some Flippo stories:
Chat & Spin Radio, from Friday, June 24, 2022. Join us for a lively description of all my books!
Grab a last drink on the beach with Flippo & enjoy!
~Have you bought a copy of Flippo’s biography yet? Believe it or not—it’s been two years. Go here for your hardback or paperback: https://www.laradasbooks.com or at Amazon.
~For me, it’s Christmas all year long! Here’s a variety of Christmas greetings from Flippo & Neeca, featuring his song, “When It’s Christmas Time in Texas”: https://youtu.be/mpJCUGffU3A
~Wish You Were Here: A Novel by Jodi Picoult, one of my favorite authors, deals with the COVID pandemic in fiction as opposed to my nonfiction book. Check it out! Interesting story!
Read, reflect and respond!
~I’m not afraid of tough subjects like the coronavirus. Yes, I get people are tired of hearing about it, but. . . Visit my website to find out about my new book, Coronavirus Reflections: Bitter or Better? and my other five books and three cookbooks: https://laradasbooks.com
On Friday, July 29, I returned to Colorado for a fun-filled time with my brother. We took our cousin Lisa to Cuchara, Colorado, on Saturday. Then Sunday we rose early and drove to Denver to see the Colorado Rockies play the Dodgers. Then, Monday morning, we got up and went to the Denver Broncos Training Camp! We explored the beautiful Colorado mountains and then went on to Denver and a sports adventure! What fun we had!
Cuchara, Colorado with Lisa
Dog BarMy brother, me & Lisa at lunch in the Dog Bar
On July 25, 2022, I received this text from Lisa: “Are you in Branson or back in Tijeras?”
I let her know I plan to go to Branson the next day and found out she would be in the area for a while, so we agreed to find some time together.
When I arrived in Branson on Friday, July 29, my brother and I put together plans for the next couple of days.
“How about we take Lisa to Cuchara tomorrow?” He asked. I texted her, and we made our plans.
I said, “Let’s go to the Bronco’s Training Camp on Monday.” My brother stated, “If we’re going to Denver, why not go to a Rockies’ baseball game on Sunday?” So the die was cast!
On Saturday morning, Lisa met us in Branson, we left Branson at 9:30 am and drove to Cuchara, a lovely drive west of Trinidad through the mountains. We stopped by Monument Lake, driving around the lake and marveling at the high level of water in the lake. Then we drove by North Lake and I reminisced about attending church camp at Camp Salvation near the lake.
From there we drove to Stonewall, Colorado and stopped at the store there, a favorite of ours for fun touristy items. It was on to Cuchara where we toured some stores. We ate lunch at the Dog Bar outside on the patio, enjoying all the dogs and their owners at this fun-loving bar.
After lunch, we continued our shopping tour and ended up at the Yacht Club for a drink and more conversation. My brother and I so enjoy any time we have with Lisa!
On the drive home, my brother saw a bear, but Lisa and I, heavy in conversation, didn’t see it, so we turned around to find this wildlife, but we didn’t. We hit a heavy rainstorm which we all celebrated because of the need for rain.
What a delightful time we had with Lisa in our favorite funky mountain town.
Trip to Denver & Colorado Rockies Game
On Sunday morning, we left Branson at 7:00 am, just in case there was any traffic issues on I-25 northbound. Because it’s a four hour drive, we cushioned the arrival time, just in case. It was a pleasant trip with no problems.
Once we got to Denver, finding Coors Field became a major task. My brother thought there would be signage up on I-25, but there was nothing. My Car Play app on my Jeep and iPhone weren’t working correctly, so that added to the confusion. After wandering around downtown, finally we found the Coors Field’s parking lot, parked and caught the shuttle to the field.
Because we arrived early, we had lots of time to walk around the stadium and enjoy the sights. We each bought a foot-long hotdog and delicious fries for lunch. After eating, we went to the store and looked around, but fans overflowed, so we got out quickly.
Then we went upstairs to the Rooftop Bar and took pictures. Up on that level, purple seats identify “A Mile High” in that level.
Me & My Brother near the Rooftop BarPurple Seats One Mile High
What a hot day! 90 degrees and we were in the sun for most of the game. I enjoyed the game, having bought a score sheet and pencil so I would watch it closer. When we were in high school, I kept a score book for my brother’s games and gave it to him as a graduation gift, but he had to help me with some notations—too many years away from baseball!
My brother is a San Francisco Giants fan, so he didn’t want the Dodgers to win, but they did and there were Dodger fans everywhere!
After the game we found our hotel, but it wasn’t where we thought it was going to be—within blocks of Dove Valley and the Bronco Training Camp the next morning. We had a delicious Mexican dinner at the Hacienda Colorado next door and spent the evening relaxing and watching TV.
Denver Broncos Training Camp, Denver, Colorado
Me and My Brother Waiting in Line for the Broncos Training Camp
On Monday morning, we again got up early, grabbed a ridiculously minimalist breakfast at the hotel and drove to Dove Valley. We arrived before the parking opened next to the training camp, so we parked some ways away and walked.
By doing that, we got in line ahead of those parking close to the camp. We waited in line from 8:00 – 9:00 am. When they opened the gate, the workers controlled the crowd, and we had front-row seats (on grass). Then, we had to wait another hour before it started. The Broncos provided free water and also had plenty of misters where fans could cool down.
Being avid Bronco fans, my brother and I have wanted to attend training camp for years, but it never worked out before. What an experience!
See the sea of orange behind me!Selfie of me and my brotherThe field is right there!
There we sat in the blazing, scorching sun—ended up being 94 degrees! I wore a bare shoudlers top—I have no idea what I was thinking! But I did have a light hoodie with me and I alternately draped it over my shoulders and then my legs.
The whole thing fascinated me with all the veteran players I love and the new players vying for a position on the team. When Russell Wilson, our new quarterback gained from Seattle, came on the field, the crowd exploded.
For most of it, we could clearly see the drills and the running backs were so close, it was exceptional. Onedrill they did farther away with the non-players standing between us and the action. That drug on and on!
Our kicker, Brandon McManus, entertained the crowd during one part. He got fairly close to us and kicked the football into the crowd. Fans threw it back to him, then he moved farther back and kicked again. This went on for quite a while.
Jerry Jeudy High FivingK J Hamler High Fiving
At the end, some players came by all us crazy fans lined up for autographs and high fives. My brother still for the high fives but gave up for the autographs. I got a few.
Russell practiced with two receivers right in front of us for a long time after the autograph time began and regular practice ended. Then he took off his helmet and started autographs at the end of line to the right of me.
Hot, tired and not feeling optimistic he’d come as far as where I stood, I gave up and found my brother further up the hill. I went to the bathroom and talked to a woman in there who worked at the camp.
She said I shouldn’t have given up because Russell walks down the entire line and gives autographs to everyone he can! It devastated me! So close to getting his autograph!
On our trip home, we left the craziness of Denver and ate lunch in Castle Rock and drove home. All in all, it was a fantastic time for us, but we both decided we never needed to return to training camp.
Finally,
Are you a sports fan? If so, which team? Which sport?
~NEW—Join me for my One-Year Anniversary of the Release of Coronavirus Reflections: Bitter or Better? Celebration on Zoom Wednesday, August 24, 2022 at 7:30 PM MST. Email me at larada@icloud.com for the Zoom meeting information.
~MY FIRST AUDIOBOOK IS AVAILABLE: Go to Audible to buy my first audiobook, Let Me Tell You a Story. I’m working on Coronavirus Reflections: Bitter or Better? but have gotten stalled with shingles.
~Do you listen to podcasts? Here are three podcasts with interviews about my new book & some Flippo stories:
Chat & Spin Radio, from Friday, June 24, 2022. Join us for a lively description of all my books!
~Have you bought a copy of Flippo’s biography yet? Believe it or not—it’s been two years. Go here for your hardback or paperback: https://www.laradasbooks.com or at Amazon.
~For me, it’s Christmas all year long! Here’s a variety of Christmas greetings from Flippo & Neeca, featuring his song, “When It’s Christmas Time in Texas”: https://youtu.be/mpJCUGffU3A
~Wish You Were Here: A Novelby Jodi Picoult, one of my favorite authors, deals with the COVID pandemic in fiction as opposed to my nonfiction book. Check it out! Interesting story!
~What happened to you in 2020-2021 during the coronavirus pandemic? Do you care? Are you on a spiritual path? Do you want to heal from the horrible effects of the pandemic of 2020? Visit my website to find out about my new book, Coronavirus Reflections: Bitter or Better? and my other five books and three cookbooks: https://laradasbooks.com
I turn sixty-nine years-old tomorrow and wonder about how quickly I got here! Let me ponder life at the end of my sixth decade.
At each major birthday in my life, I’ve advanced easily, without regret or any desire to be younger and go backwards. I have always felt age was an attitude and looked forward to the future with anticipation! Often, I still feel sixteen inside!
Turning Thirty
My Watermelon with Crepe PaperMe in Grandma’s Undies
When I moved from twenty-nine to thirty, my family gathered together at my parent’s home in Branson and celebrated with a watermelon (crepe paper around it). Watermelons have always been my favorite fruit and my young nephew giggled as he presented it to me. They also gave me a survival kit for me that included a pair of my grandma’s underwear (see picture above) and a set of false teeth. And then my Aunt Willie added to the festivities and decorated a cake which said, “One foot on the grave and one on a banana peel!”
Turning Sixty
Sadly, when I turned sixty, Mom had just died, so my heart broke on my birthday because I found out she had big plans for my big birthday that year. But I enjoyed being with Lin, my brother and Aunt Willie. Mom always made birthdays memorable, and Lin continues to do that.
Turning Sixty-Nine
Beautiful birthday bouquet from Lin
Yesterday morning, Lin brought me a beautiful bouquet to start my birthday celebration; he said! Last night he forewarned me I needed to be dressed and ready to leave here at 5:15 PM for dinner tomorrow night—mysterious and so much fun!
At sixty-nine, I have had an amazing life, filled with much heartache and so much joy. Isn’t that what many people experience in this life? Last November, I came up with a resounding motto when I took part in a blog challenge where I posted blogs daily for the month of November. That motto is “a baby boomer with a purpose.”
You might wonder what that motto means to me. When it hit me so sharply last year, I felt deep down that described who I am. Yes, I’m a baby boomer, and just because I’m a designated “Senior Citizen,” I’m not done!
I’m not done with
Challenging myself—I continue as a lifelong learner.
Growth—My Christian beliefs grow daily. My spiritual life expands.
Adventure—In Lin, I have the perfect life partner to look at life as an adventure.
Writing—I’m working on my seventh book and have three poetry books and a fiction in the queue.
Traveling—Lin and I have two cruises planned for this year and more trips for 2023.
Dancing—I will dance ‘til I die because Harold and Elva Horner were my dancing parents!
So, as I face the end of my 60s, I look back and marvel. Yes, I have had several health issues over these last nine years, but I have had so many blessings. And I choose to focus on the blessings—my late-in-life writing career, my delightful, dear husband, my brother and family ranch and my exceptional family and friends. During these last nine years, I have hundreds of hilarious memories with each of these people and on our family ranch.
So, yes, as a part of being fully alive, I take part in a variety of sites in the social media world. On LinkedIn.com, I met another senior with a purpose, Idessa Toney, whose website, Seniors with a Purpose, and her YouTube channel, captured my attention. Idessa and I share a passion for living life now, no matter what age. Be sure and visit her website.
As much as I love my parents, I remember them so old at sixty-nine. Is that true or my perception only? My dad had breathing issues, and he started downhill about this age. He died at seventy-eight. At sixty-nine, my mom had been a widow for a year, burdened with the loss of her life partner. I had the privilege of being closely connected with her until her death at eighty-four. Yes, I feel much younger than I remember them to be!
Finally,
Tomorrow I age one year, but I look forward to my last year in my 60s. I trust my God to provide a memorable, fun-filled year. Then, look out 70s, because I know they offer adventure, life and surprises. I opt for it all!
How do you feel about aging? Do you dread a certain age? Do you have a motto?
~WATCH MY NEW INTERVIEW on Chat & Spin Radio, Friday, June 24 at 1:00 PM. Join us for a lively discussion of my books!
~MY FIRST AUDIOBOOK IS AVAILABLE: Go to Audible to buy my first audiobook, Let Me Tell You a Story. I’m working on Coronavirus Reflections: Bitter or Better? but have gotten stalled with shingles.
~Do you listen to podcasts? Here are three podcasts with interviews about my new book & some Flippo stories:
~Have you bought a copy of Flippo’s biography yet? Believe it or not—it’s been two years. Go here for your hardback or paperback: https://www.laradasbooks.com or at Amazon.
~For me, it’s Christmas all year long! Here’s a variety of Christmas greetings from Flippo & Neeca, featuring his song, “When It’s Christmas Time in Texas”: https://youtu.be/mpJCUGffU3A
~What happened to you in 2020-2021 during the coronavirus pandemic? Do you care? Are you on a spiritual path? Do you want to heal from the horrible effects of the pandemic of 2020? Visit my website to find out about my new book, Coronavirus Reflections: Bitter or Better? and my other five books and three cookbooks: https://laradasbooks.com
I experienced major confusion about my womanhood for many years. A silent war raged inside me, yet I didn’t understand why. Many women suffer from this same silent killer, and I feel my story is appropriate as the USA again becomes divided over yet another issue—Roe vs. Wade.
You may wonder why I choose to talk about my internal battle on this Mother’s Day. In 1993, my mom played a key role in healing my heart over this tumultuous experience, and her response changed my life.
Let me state my position early so you can decide whether to read on. I am ProChoice. Two family members molested me as a child, causing this stance. I do not support abortion as a means of after-thought birth control, but I support it for mother’s health reasons, rape and incest cases.
As an incest survivor, someone damaged my femininity, confusing me about my womanhood, at an early age. With one perpetrator, this abuse started when I was about four and continued until I was eight or nine. It began with him touching me inappropriately and it ended with him forcing me to touch him. God protected me when the government drafted him, which magically took him away and ended the abuse. I’m sure the next step for him was the rape of an eight years old!
I just did the math and realized he stopped when I was eight or nine. I had always thought it lasted until I was twelve. It seemed to go on forever!
As I’ve read similar stories this week—one little girl pregnant at eleven by her uncle, I had to respond. I’ve spent this week pondering this subject and its effect on me. Specifically, I wondered what would have happened to my family if that person had raped me.
We lived in a small rural ranching community. Everybody knew everybody. At eight or nine years old, I was in the second or third grade, more interested in riding my bike, doing well at school, talking to my girlfriends, and playing with dolls.
Because I would have been so young, I wouldn’t have gotten pregnant. But had the rape happened to me, me and my family would have been destroyed. Yes, the molestation damaged me, but I kept it secret for thirty-five years. The rape would have been a different story, with immediate outrageous repercussions.
Why do I open this dark curtain to one of my deepest pains? Incest and rape wound little girls, grown women, whatever their age, setting them up to be the victims of rape. If forced to keep the pregnancy of a rape, every day the victim would face their perpetrator, looking at that child and the rape would happen again and again. We can’t let that happen.
Women, we must unite and stand up for our sisters whose lives have been so damaged by the violent act of rape and incest. We cannot punish the victim of this hideous offense by demanding she keep a baby, the result of violence against the mother.
This message seems especially important and poignant on this day, set aside for mothers across our country. We need not force motherhood upon a woman who is the victim of a crime against her.
Let me share the gift my mom gave me and why I want to honor her today. After I got out of CoDA treatment in 1988, when I first confronted my parents about what had happened to me at the hands of family members, they sat shocked. It totally affected how we met together as a family from then on.
Later, I mustered up the courage to ask Mom about a time I remembered her coming into my bedroom, and I was being molesting and she turned around and walked away. She said she didn’t remember.
In 1993, my confusion of my womanhood, caused by my incest/molestation issues, raged out of control, so I went into Sexual Trauma treatment. The counselor gathered information from the clients about key areas that needed discussion during the family week for healing. So, during that special week, my second husband, Mom and Dad attended. I talked to each about pressing issues. When I got to Mom, I told her about her denial of that incident in my bedroom. She sobbed and sobbed, and said, “I am so sorry.” Her admission healed something so deep inside of me, and our relationship zoomed to a different level after that.
My confusion about me as a woman placed me in many compromising situations. I suffered domestic violence at the hands of my first husband. During my drinking days, my confusion put me in many risky situations, doing things I never thought I would do. Luckily, no one raped me, but after I sobered up, I wondered about my promiscuity. It all tied back to being a little girl robbed of her precious identity as a female and wounded until I sought healing. It has taken decades to resolve this issue for me.
Many wounded women, victims of incest and molestation, aren’t as lucky as me. They fall prey to predators that rape them and leave them to face the choice of what to do with the results of that violent act. Roe vs. Wade gave them an option. With it gone, they have no options.
Finally, I share my intimate story to, hopefully, open your eyes to whom many rape victims are—woman confused about their womanhood, possibly wounded at the hands of a childhood predator and then once more, attacked and victimized as a rape victim. I pray my story makes you think differently about the repercussions for these women with the loss of Roe vs. Wade. We need to protect these women, not victimize them once again.
I want to provide some resources for incest, rape or domestic violence victims:
~NEWEST PODCAST to be released Thursday, March 17, 2022, discussing my new book, Coronavirus Reflections: Bitter or Better? : Live on Purpose Podcast at https://liveonpurposeradio.com/category/podcast/
~MY FIRST AUDIOBOOK IS AVAILABLE: Go to Audible to buy my first audiobook, Let Me Tell You a Story. I’m working on Coronavirus Reflections: Bitter or Better? but have gotten stalled with shingles.
~Do you listen to podcasts? Here are three podcasts with interviews about my new book & some Flippo stories:
~Have you bought a copy of Flippo’s biography yet? Believe it or not—it’s been two years. Go here for your hardback or paperback: https://www.laradasbooks.com or at Amazon.
~For me, it’s Christmas all year long! Here’s a variety of Christmas greetings from Flippo & Neeca, featuring his song, “When It’s Christmas Time in Texas”: https://youtu.be/mpJCUGffU3A
~What happened to you in 2020-2021 during the coronavirus pandemic? Do you care? Are you on a spiritual path? Do you want to heal from the horrible effects of the pandemic of 2020? Visit my website to find out about my new book, Coronavirus Reflections: Bitter or Better? and my other five books and three cookbooks: https://laradasbooks.com
During my life, I have not had the stereotypical mother-in-law. My two precious mothers-in-law have blessed me. My first, Lucy Prichard, became my spiritual mother, and my last one, Betty Daunt, healed not only my spirit but my body and soul. This tribute focuses on Betty because she died a couple of weeks ago.
I just attended the memorial service for Betty Daunt last Tuesday, January 18, 2022. I cried deeply that day, knowing I had such profound grief. At the service, one of her daughters hugged me, crying and said, “Mom thought of you like a daughter.” I knew that to be true, and I cried.
How Betty Affected Me
In 1993, I became deathly ill and doctors couldn’t explain what was wrong. After returning home after a ten-day stay in the hospital, Betty offered to do a weekly massage with no charge and I saw my brother-in-law’s partner for weekly acupuncture appointments. I left the hospital not able to go to the bathroom; after one week of these dual appointments I could go. Betty continued the weekly massages for months until I got on my feet again. I continued receiving massages from her for almost thirty years.
I divorced Betty’s son in 1994 and continued to see Betty monthly because she was my massage therapist. She handled the divorce admirably, seldom ever mentioning her son to me. And I continued to think of her as my mother-in-law. Because we had been close before the divorce, we kept up our relationship with my massage appointment and many dinners out and evenings at Popejoy Theater.
Betty filled every time out with her with lots of laughter and joy. I still hear her infectious giggle, which truly was a titter.
But Betty went beyond fun. She touched me deeply and respected my body in her massages, bringing new life to the wounded areas, especially focusing on the hurt little girl’s pain I had carried for my lifetime.
When she massaged me, I got to the point when Betty flipped me over on my stomach, I fell sleep, a deep renewing sleep and only woke when she finished.
Early in her treating me, I memorized all of her movements and areas she concentrated on—and yelped like a wounded pup when she did foot reflexology on my feet and hit one of my sensitive sinus points. Betty used a pencil to touch the various points on my feet, and I swore she dug into those areas until I watched her treat my ex-husband’s feet. She did not.
After every massage, Betty served me a cup of water and encouraged me to go home and not touch my computer. She knew I worked overtime on my computer.
With her hilarious sense of humor, Betty trained me to jiggle my breasts to avoid breast cancer. During each massage, she’d ask, “Have you jiggled her breasts today?” I laughed and promised her I had!
After Mom died in 2013, Betty consoled. She spent an hour before my treatment holding me and crying with me over my major loss. She loved my parents and enjoyed her trips to Branson, Colorado, and to our ranch. My favorite memory of her there: as Dad drove out of the canyon up a steep four-wheel-drive trail, Betty dove to the floor and said when we topped out, “Next time, I’m going to walk!”
During my massage and any time we were together, Betty shared her spiritual path and wisdom. She invited me to attend a conference in 1992 for Alternative Healers. We saw Deepak Chopra and Wayne Dyer. What a day that was for both of us, and we often talked about the influence that day had on our spiritual paths.
A few years ago, Betty stopped doing massages, and I tried other massage therapists, but they didn’t compare. I haven’t had a massage in a couple years, and interestingly, I’ve had major sinus and stomach issues since. I wonder???
Betty always challenged me in all my thinking about self-care and repeated each time as we grow older, we need to stretch daily. Then she would ask if I did. She stayed on top of my health in all ways.
For our last time together, I joined Betty and her daughter at Betty’s grandson’s baseball game in the spring of 2021. We laughed and caught up on each other’s lives. What a wonderful time we had together. After that, we only talked on the phone.
As I ponder Betty’s influence on me over the last thirty years, I realize how big it was—much bigger than a mother-in-law relationship. Because of her, I thought outside of the Western medical world and sought massage and acupuncture. I took herbs and additives she suggested. I witnessed a devote Catholic woman who spoke freely of her beliefs and her willingness to embrace a wide spiritual path.
Finally, I have spoken mostly about my mother-in-law, Betty Daunt. Lucy Prichard touched my life deeply too, but I needed to honor the place Betty played in my life. Thank you, Betty, for your deep love of life, health and me!
~Here’s Christmas greetings from Flippo & Neeca, featuring his song, “When Its Christmas Time in Texas”: https://youtu.be/mpJCUGffU3A
~Visit my website to find out about my new book, Coronavirus Reflections: Bitter or Better? and my other five books and three cookbooks: https://laradasbooks.com
New Year’s Eve 2021 is here! I always get nostalgic thinking of past New Year’s Eves, so I’d like to share some with you.
New Year’s Eve With Bub & Lela
My brother, Bub, and his wife, Lela were my favorite New Year’s Eve partiers! For a couple of years, we went out to a bar in Clearlake Oaks, California and danced to country and western music. They followed one band and became good friends with the whole band and their spouses, so it felt like family.
My sister-in-law, the perfect playmate, dressed up with me, and we sprayed glitter in our hair and out the door we went. After doing that a couple of years, we became known as the “Glitter Girls.”
When the bar closed, we often went to someone’s house to continue the party—being in our early thirties, we had the energy to stay up late, drink a lot and keep going. One year, we came home after the party at someone’s house and went through all their pictures. We finally went to bed around 5:00 AM.
One year, I rode out to California with a friend on Amtrak. We woke up New Year’s Eve morning in the party car, and we had a party day traveling to Sacramento.
Square & Round Dancing on This Night
When I started square dancing, I loved to dance on New Year’s Eve with the tradition of ending the year with a dance, then starting the new year with another one.
For a couple of years, my ex and I drove to Raleigh, North Carolina, to spend Christmas with his brother and then attend a round dance festival at Myrtle Beach, South Carolina that ended on New Year’s Eve. During the festival before the holiday, Charlie Lovelace and Wayne and Barbara Blackford taught us some gorgeous higher-level dances. I loved being on the beach, too.
I had gotten into the habit of calling Mom in Colorado on New Year’s Eve—so, not thinking, I called her from Myrtle Beach when we got back to our room to wish her a “Happy New Year.” I didn’t realize it was late in Colorado, but she didn’t blink an eye! She was so glad to hear from me.
For several years, my ex and I went to Green Valley, Arizona, for New Year’s Eve. They served a delicious sit-down dinner, and then we square and round danced. We have so many friends in Arizona; it was a delight to celebrate with them there.
After Lin and I got together, we celebrated many years at the Albuquerque Square Dance Center with our Albuquerque square dance family. They got into the habit of observing the New York time of celebrating the New Year at 10:00 PM, our time, so we became used to an earlier night on New Year’s Eve.
Unique Night for New Year’s Eve
The most unique New Year’s Eve was Marshall Flippo’s last square dance in Green Valley, Arizona in 2017. About twenty-five callers came from all over the United States to see their mentor and friend call his last dance.
Flippo called a fun-filled dance. During the night, I saw groups of callers watching him on stage, emotions mixed for everyone.
During the amazing night, Flippo handpicked his music. He sang, “Another Square Dance Caller.” He shared a heartfelt thank you to everyone in attendance and ended his final dance with the song, “I’m Leaving Here a Better Man.” I’m sure that’s how he felt that night!
Larada Horner-Miller, Just Another Square Dance Caller: Authorized Biography of Marshall Flippo, (2020): 327.
What made that New Year’s Eve dance so unique—anyone there witnessed the end of an era with Flippo ending his square dance calling career. I felt honored to be there!
The Last Few Years on New year’s Eve
For a variety of health reasons of ours, we’ve been at-home the last few years on New Year’s Eve—not my idea of how to spend this holiday. And yes, during the pandemic last year we watched TV to ring in the new year.
Finally,
I enjoy celebrating the end of the current year and the anticipatory feelings of the new one coming. Putting on a silly paper hat, blowing a horn and throwing up confetti make me feel celebratory, but I love to observe this festive night dancing and being with friends.
Do you celebrate New Year’s Eve? If so, how? What is your favorite New Year’s Eve memory?
Here’s Christmas greetings from Flippo & Neeca, featuring his song, “When Its Christmas Time in Texas”:https://youtu.be/mpJCUGffU3A
Visit my website to find out about my new book, Coronavirus Reflections: Bitter or Better? and my other five books and three cookbooks: https://laradasbooks.com
