Last year during March I celebrated women in my life, not well-known women but family and friends. Looking at women in my life, I truly enjoyed honoring those women who touched me in a special way. I want to continue that tradition this year.
Last year, I wrote about
- My mom, Elva Dickerson Horner – https://laradasbooks.com/2023/03/05/celebrate-women-this-month/
- My three aunts: Helen Horner Waldroup, Joan Horner Doherty, and Willa Lee Dickerson Urbanoski – https://laradasbooks.com/2023/03/12/three-aunts-to-celebrate/
- Rose Ward, a dear lifelong friend – https://laradasbooks.com/2023/03/19/rose-ward-another-woman-to-celebrate/
- Kathi Raver, my best square dance girlfriend – https://laradasbooks.com/2023/03/26/kathi-raver-another-woman-to-celebrate/
So, this year I want to honor my childhood and lifelong friend, Candy McMillan Vargas.
Candy was born on July 8, 1952, and my brother, Harold (Bub) was born May 25, 1952. Our mothers enjoyed being young pregnant women together, telling hilarious stories about getting their car stuck in the mud with their enormous bellies. Candy’s dad and my dad were best friends. So, we grew up together.
For many years, Candy and I were the only girls in Branson, Colorado, a small ranching town. So, I remember my early playtime with her—donning our mom’s dresses, hats, and shoes. Then we threw purses over our shoulders. Those female items transported us to be Ethel and Lucy for sure.
So much of my childhood memories center on Candy and her family. They owned the grocery store in Branson, so we visited often. Also, back then, people visited each other’s houses in the evening.
Candy’s dad shared the same date as my birthday, June 27, so he and I had a special gift exchange each year—another thing that tied our families together.
Candy moved away about the time she was twelve, but we didn’t lose contact. One morning she arrived at our doorstep at 6:00 AM, having just jumped off the train to come and see us. We felt like she was family.
Candy moved back to Trinidad, Colorado and graduated from high school there. We ended up going to Trinidad State Junior College together her last year, then she moved to Pueblo, Colorado. Candy was maid-of-honor at my first and second wedding. For my last wedding to Lin, she had passed away six weeks before.
She married Michael Vargas in Pueblo, and I was her matron-of-honor. Then they moved to Denver, just a few short blocks from where my first husband and I lived. I celebrated with her and Michael when their children, Sonia and Shane, were born.
When I graduated in 1986 from Colorado State University, Mom and Dad hosted a major shindig at a bar I frequented often, and Candy catered the delicious meal. She also partied like a crazy lady with me to celebrate my big day.
Candy listened to all my woes about my first husband, our marriage and divorce. After our divorce and my graduation from Fort Collins, Colorado, I lived with her and Michael for six months to get established in Denver because I got a teaching job there. I will always treasure those six months living with her and her family—special fun family times like cheering on the Broncos on Sundays and weekly watching Cheers, one of our favorite TV shows at the time. She always came to my rescue and added to my life.
When I moved to Raton, New Mexico, she continued having me cut her hair every six weeks and lined up enough friends to get perms and cuts to make my trip profitable. (I was a beautician for 14 years before becoming a teacher.).
In 2005, when Lela, my sister-in-law died, we had a second funeral and her burial in Branson. Candy brought a tent to set up out in the backyard because of the hot July weather and helped Mom and I handle the meal after the service.
Diagnosed with kidney cancer, a group of her friends bought these “Team Candy Rocks!” t-shirts to support her. She loved the idea. I still have my “Team Candy Rocks!” t-shirt tucked away in a safe place.
Candy died September 13, 2011, and I had been experiencing some strange health episodes. The night she died, I had one of the worst ones yet at a square dance. After calling 911, I went to the hospital. They found nothing identifiably wrong, but my doctor strongly suggested I not drive to Denver, Colorado for her funeral on September 19. So, I didn’t, but I took the day off from work and had a private ceremony I prepared at home by myself. That broke my heart not to honor her by attending! I will always regret not saying goodbye formally to her and her family I love so much. Sonia, her daughter, told me later they had a rose for me to lay on her coffin at the burial site. Candy’s daughter takes after her mother in so many ways!
Candy’s hilarious sense-of-humor and jokes, her delicious home-cooked meals steeped in Texan traditions and her deep friendship remind me daily of my dear friend. I still see her sparkling eyes and hear her contagious laughter and know that I am a better person for having known her and been loved by her. Thank you, Candy, for everything you did.
Yes, March is here again, and I have looked forward to this time of honoring the women in my life. Candy holds a high place of honor for me!
Do you have a woman in your life you need to honor this month? Because of her death, I lost the opportunity of doing this while she lived, but it’s never too late. Be sure and honor the women in your life today!
~Vote for my book cover of Hair on Fire and make me the “Cover of the Month” queen. https://allauthor.com/cover-of-the-month/17423/
~Enjoy my recent interview on the podcast, The Writing Table
~ Hair on Fire: A Heartwarming & Humorous Christmas Memoir available in audiobook format at the following places:
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