Category: Spirituality

End on a High Note: National Poetry Month Draws to a Close!
My Thoughts · poetry · Spirituality

End on a High Note: National Poetry Month Draws to a Close!

Larada Horner-MillerLeave a comment
National Poetry Month draws to an end

The end comes soon to National Poetry Month and this will be my last post to celebrate my poetry. I end with one of my favorite poems I’ve written, Spirit Coyote.

Often I took early morning walks around an Indian burial ground in the southeastern part of Albuquerque, New Mexico near our home. I walked along the chain link fence and wondered about it. This actually happened to me on one of those walks.

Coyote - end

Spirit Coyote

September 20, 2000

A Walk Near Our House

One soft quiet dawn I see you and my deep heart knows.
We know each other profoundly          
            beyond time and space.
 
Your eyes haunt me
            following my every move.
Your home, a sacred Indian burial ground,
separated from the world and me by a chain link fence.
Ancient ones honored!
 
I walk by here daily on the outside—
you and them gather together today on the inside.
 
Are you coyote?  Are you spirit?  I can’t be sure!
I question as I’m mesmerized by you.
            You turn away from me, and          
                        I recognize your lean frame.
You are coyote!
 
Death has captured them
            and you, too,
		or are you captured?
Are you dead?
	Are you free?
 
You follow my moves;
            stealthily you step towards me.
I gulp worried you will charge,
            but your movement stops towards me.
Now you move with me, alongside me.
 
I feel comfort in your presence—
            no fear,
            a companion that knows my heart.
You rise up on a small mound
            then you’re gone—gone forever!
 
A chain link fence separates us.
            You locked in with the dead,
                        me alive outside,
                        walking free,
            yet skirting you and death.
		Are you here every day?
 
At times, I hear the chains in the fence rattle in the breeze, 
            yet I know it’s not the breeze—
            	the sound is too severe.
            I know it’s spirits, like you caught in that place,
                        that place between the unknown,
                        a place I know so well!
 
We are one; I see it!
Death, spirit coyote and me
            roaming through this life!
Those ancient ones inside me clamor to be
            free, to be put to rest!
 
Your spirit sought me out
            with a message.
Some natives see you as the trickster,
            the predator by ranchers.
Others see you as the tourist symbol of the Southwest
            and place a red bandana around your neck.
		What a shame!
 
Your spirit is larger, filling the arroyo
            and canyon of my heart.
You roam free—
            so, take me along!
I yearn to roam free,
            to howl at the moon,
                           at my loneliness,
                           at my aloneness,
                           at the other spirits walking my same path.

Larada Horner-Miller, Time Measured Out!: Navigating Life’s Journey Through Poetry, (Horner Publishing Company, 2025): TBA

If you would like to hear me read the first few stanzas of this poem, here it is: https://youtu.be/A08M4BpuP5c?si=TMOkD6ySgfncRKyV

I have so enjoyed sharing my poetry this month with you! This month, I’ve read many of my poems and shared them on social media. If you missed them, they are also on my YouTube channel.

Finally,

I just sent the manuscript of book #2 of my four-book poetry series, Time Measure Out!: Navigating Life’s Journey Through Poetry, to my editor. Wow! That always feels like such an accomplishment! This is my tenth book! That’s hard to imagine! And more to come, so be ready!

My Newest Books

Is My Truth Universal?: A Woman’s Poetic Odyssey e-book – FREE

Was It a Dream?: Navigating Life’s Journey Through Poetry e-book on sale for $3.99

Hair on Fire

Hair on Fire: A Heartwarming & Humorous Christmas Memoir e-book on sale for $5.99

Buy My Audio Books:

This Tumbleweed Landed

This Tumbleweed Landed audiobook cover

Let Me Tell You a Story 

Let Me Tell You a Story audiobook cover

Hair on Fire: A Heartwarming & Humorous Memoir Audiobook

Hair on Fire: A Heartwarming & Humorous Christmas Memoir audiobook cover

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An Emotional Trigger: Do You Have Any Idea!
Book Promotion · My Thoughts · Spirituality

An Emotional Trigger: Do You Have Any Idea!

Larada Horner-MillerLeave a comment
Emotional redhead - emotional trigger

As an incest/rape survivor, the results of this last election have devastated me. After the unforgettable loss in 2016, this tragic loss has triggered me again emotionally with profound consequences.

NOTICE:

If you’re a Trump supporter, you probably don’t want to read any further and you may want to unsubscribe from my blog posts. The world has changed!

An Emotional Trigger Definition

“. . . a trigger is an instance when you become physically and/or emotionally reactive to something that relates to the trauma you have experienced. These symptoms and feelings are part of your brain’s natural response to unsafe experiences from the past.”

Common Symptoms: Triggers

2016 – An Emotional Trigger Big Time!

In 2016 thinking Hillary Clinton would win, I sat in shock when her defeat was announced. I sat up until after 2:00 AM before she conceded. Lin went to bed earlier but came down stairs and asked who won, honestly thinking she had won.

When I announced who won, it shocked him even though he supported the other candidate. He said I looked like someone had beat me up. And that’s how I felt.

Why did I respond so deeply? He’s a perpetrator, plain and simple. On October 7, 2016, just a month before the election, this was revealed:

“In a video from 2005 published by The Washington Post on Friday, Republican presidential candidate Donald J. Trump can be heard making lewd comments about women to then-Access Hollywood host Billy Bush.”

https://www.etonline.com/news/199902_donald_trump_and_billy_bush_discuss_nancy_o_dell_2005_recording

He became an emotional trigger for me with this disclosure, but I really felt this horrible information would crater his chance of being elected. It didn’t. My reaction continued through his four year presidency.

2020 – I Wasn’t Prepared for the Emotional Trigger

Thankfully, Joe Biden defeated him! I sighed with relief, but then sat glued to the TV screen on January 6, 2021 when he led a violate insurrection of our capitol. Again, I dealt with an emotional trigger with him and had to listen to him whine about his lost election which he never accepted. He just kept emotions stirred up for years!

2024 – A Deep Emotional Trigger

So, here we are! For many years of my life, I wondered what was wrong with me. I made three bad choices of husbands. During my active drinking days, I never understood my promiscuous behavior because I wasn’t raised that way.

In 1988, recovery saved my life. Since then, I have done a massive amount of therapy and recover for the incest and rape I experienced at the hand of two family members as a young girl. In 1993, I went to sexual trauma treatment in Los Lunas, New Mexico. I had focused on one perpetrator when I went into CoDA (Codependence Anonymous) treatment in 1988. In Los Lunas, I focused on the second one. Now I understand my behavior and know my limits and emotional triggers.

So, the Republican candidates for president and vice president emotionally trigger me deeply with their misogynist comments and posturing. Couple that with the horrendous attacks on women’s rights, and it’s too much.

Therefore, that’s why I can’t stay here!

I’ll end with a haiku I wrote this last week. The first two lines came from my sand play therapy many years.

I’m Marilyn Monroe.

I’m a Samurai warrior.

Don’t f**k with me now!

Finally,

I had to be vulnerable today because one of my great-nieces shared deeply her concerns on social media last week, and I told her I was sharing my story in my blog post. My power today as a woman is my story and telling it. One of my perpetrators tried to silence me many years ago—no more!

If you relate to my story at all, let me know. If you need help, get in touch with the resources listed below or email me at larada@icloud.com and we can talk.

RESOURCES FOR SEXUAL TRAUMA

EXCITING NEWS:

I’m so excited and relieved. I wanted to release this book in August but the dog attack delayed it! Just this week, I released my ninth book, Was It a Dream?: Navigating Life’s Journey Through Poetry.  It’s available as a paperback or an e-book on Amazon.

LOTS AND LOTS OF SALES COMING YOUR WAY, SO BE SURE AND OPEN ANY EMAILS FROM ME!

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Mary Magdalene Ends Women’s History Month
Christianity · Easter · My Thoughts · Spirituality

Mary Magdalene Ends Women’s History Month

Larada Horner-MillerLeave a comment
Mary Magadalene
Saint Mary Magdalene, circa 1524. Creator: Bernardino Luini. (Photo by Heritage Art/Heritage Images via Getty Images)

Mary Magdalene isn’t a personal woman friend, but how apropos to end International Women’s History Month with her. So, I changed my original mission of focusing on personal women friends to feature her this Easter day.

Happy Easter! Yes, I had heard her name before and read about her in the gospels, but who was she?

“Mary Magdalene is probably one of the most versatile and controversial people in the Bible.
She’s been seen as the sorrowful sinner, the Apostle to the Apostles, Jesus’s wife/girlfriend, a guardian of secret knowledge, a chaste saint, a feminist icon, and a scandalous woman who is healed and repents.”

https://www.christepiscopalbing.com/who-was-mary-magdalene/

The Gospels mention her by name thirteen times! Mary Magdalene plays a major role in today’s gospel reading from John 20:1-18, so that’s why I wanted to focus on her. Early that first Easter morn, Mary Magdalene ventured to the tomb with two other women, Mary the mother of James, and Salome to bring spices to anoint Jesus’ body.

“The main reason a dead body was anointed with spices was to control the smell of decomposition. Jews did not practice embalming, and the funeral spices were a way to help minimize unpleasant odors. The spices the women brought to Jesus’ tomb were intended to eliminate such an odor and honor the body of Christ.”

https://www.gotquestions.org/anointing-spices.html

Empty Tomb & Jesus Leaving the Tomb
Empty Tomb
Jesus Leaving the Tomb

When they arrived, to their surprise, someone had rolled away the gigantic stone. I wonder how they planned to get into the tomb in the first place. Obviously, this band of women wouldn’t let a little thing like a big stone stop them from honoring Jesus’ body. But what now?

Where were the men, the disciples? Sleeping in? So, Mary Magdalene and company ran back and got Peter and John. The two disciples and the women raced to the tomb and found it empty, except for the linen cloth Jesus’ body was wrapped in and the kerchief that had been on His head. The two men left without any answers, wondering what all this meant.

Mary Magdalen cires

But Mary Magdalene stayed and received a major blessing with her persistence. She wept, she cried, and peeked into the tomb one last time. Again, another surprise—two angels appeared and she questioned them. Then because she stayed and didn’t leave, Mary Magdalene became the first to witness the risen Jesus.

Jesus - Mary Magdalene

At first, she didn’t recognize him, but when He spoke her name, she immediately knew it was Him. Of course, she wanted to hug Him! He was dead! He had come back to life! Thoughts raced through her head—I saw him on the cross three days ago. The Roman guard pierced His side, but here He is!

As she went to grab Him, Jesus warned her to not hold on. So what did she do? Again, Mary Magdalene raced to the disciples to tell them she had seen Jesus alive—the first witness of the resurrected Jesus!

As I pondered this story in church this morning, I realized God honored Mary Magdalene’s dedication in going to the tomb early that first Easter so long ago, her persistence in staying at the tomb in her grief and confusion, and her resilience in sharing the Good News about Jesus with the disciples.

Where would Christianity be today if she had trudged back with Peter and John and missed her opportunity to see the Risen Lord? To witness his resurrected body? To share with the disciples his resurrection?

Mary Magdalene’s message for me: Stay committed to my heart’s dedications. She reminds me to honor my grief and confusion any time by standing still where I am and not running away and then my God will share a serendipitous moment with Jesus.

Jesus is Alive! - Mary Magdalene

I hope your Easter has been blessed and that Mary Magdalene takes on a more meaningful role in your life today. So often, so many cultures today disparaged women around the world today, but this proves to me that my God believes women have an equal place in the world—He had a woman be the first witness of the Resurrected Jesus. That says a lot! And who can disagree with God?

Lastly, my book cover for Hair on Fire: A Heartwarming & Humorous Christmas Memoir, won 1st place in the March nonfiction book cover contest on AllAuthors.com.  Thanks to all who supported me this month by voting on each round! I know I emailed you and posted on all my social media sites many times, but it worked—because of you!

Hair on Fire - 1st Place Book Cover Winner - Mary Magdalene

Enjoy my recent interview on the podcast, The Writing Table

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Hair on Fire: A Heartwarming & Humorous Christmas Memoir

~ Hair on Fire: A Heartwarming & Humorous Christmas Memoir available in audiobook format at the following places:

~SHOP TODAY FOR YOUR AUTOGRAPHED COPY! Shop at my Etsy Shop or my Shopify Store

What Ties My Six Books Together?
Grief · Marshall Flippo · Mom · My Books · My Thoughts · Prejudice, Mistreatment, Mexican, immigrant · Ranching · Spirituality · square dance

What Ties My Six Books Together?

Larada Horner-MillerLeave a comment
Someone holding up things that connect - ties

What Ties My Six Books Together? As I pondered this question this week, I wondered: three books about my rural childhood in southeastern Colorado, one about my grief in losing my parents, one a biography about a square dance caller and the last one about my reaction to the coronavirus pandemic. Then I saw the tie that binds them: relationships and connection to people. So, here’s how I see the tie that ties my writing together:

My First Book

This Tumbleweed Landed book cover

This Tumbleweed Landed, a memoir written in poetry and prose, focuses on people, places and events in my small rural community during my childhood. I fashioned it after Cynthia Rylant’s children’s book, Waiting to Waltz, who wrote poetry about people, places and events in a fictional town. In my book, I celebrated my childhood relationships with many notorious adults in town—Virgie Firestone and the Warners. Also, what I wrote about many of the places and events, places and times I connected with my family and friends—Branson dances and stories my dad and his school years, told sitting at our round table.

My Second Book

When Will Papa Get Home? book cover

When Will Papa Get Home?, a historical fiction, focuses on a Mexican immigrant family’s perilous times during the 20s in southeastern Colorado. Maria, the daughter, tells the story of her family’s plight. She weaves the tale of those people responsible for her papa’s false accusations.

I centered this book on familial and friend relationships and connection to people. Sadly though, this book also shows the prejudice of the time and the misconnection some people had with certain races. But her deep connection with her family wins in the end.

My Third Book

Let Me Tell You a Story book cover

Let Me Tell You a Story, a nonfiction account of how my granddad put our family ranch together during the depression when many other ranchers lost theirs, focuses on the three generations of my family and our ranch. My dad, mom and I had previously released this booklet in 1992 at my dad’s 75th birthday party. It overflows with the relationship between my dad and his dad and my granddad, and the relationship my dad and granddad had with the ranch they loved. Yes, you can have a relationship and connection with the earth! Even though it focuses on the ranch, the underlying topic is our familial relationships.

My Fourth Book

A Time to Grow Up: A Daughter's Grief Memoir

A Time to Grow Up: A Daughter’s Grief Memoir, a memoir about the loss of my parents, shows the foundation of my life and relationships: my parents. Of all my books, this book hurt to write, yet I love it the most! In talking about my loss, I feature the unique relationship I had with each parent. First, I connected with each of them, making it easier to connect with others in the world.

My Fifth Book

Just Another Square Dance Caller: Authorized Biography of Marshall Flippo

Just Another Square Dance Caller: Authorized Biography of Marshall Flippo, a biography of the most famous square dance caller in the world’s, first and foremost highlights relationships and connections with people. Yes, it tells Flippo’s life story from Texas to Japan as a young man and then later in life, but a major part of his life story was his connection with his family and friends. So much so, he required a section in the book telling stories about his square and round dance friends. After fulfilling that request, I connected with callers, cuers and dancers and featured their stories about Flippo. Yes, he truly understood relationships and how to connect with just about anyone.

My Sixth Book

Coronavirus Reflections: Bitter or Better?

Coronavirus Reflections: Bitter or Better?, a spiritual self-help book written in poetry and prose, focuses on many of the perils of the coronavirus pandemic with an underlying theme the opposite of my focus: isolation. Yet this theme emphasized the extreme need I had and many others had to connect with people, to be with people, to relate with people. Thankfully, Zoom met some of those needs—a monthly get-together with two women friends I knew in Loveland, Colorado, a Christmas concert with our local caller, and many recovery meetings. But I’ll never forget the first time I went out without a mask and actually hugged someone besides my husband. Something deep inside me healed.

The lack of connection truly became the hardest part of the pandemic for me, and I see now how that appears throughout this book.

Finally,

This topic came up because I’m a multi-genre author which makes it difficult to market my books, my brand. Current training I’m attending wrestled with this dilemma. But I have no qualms about this! I love poetry and prose. Also I relish historical fiction. Writing Flippo’s biography was a privilege and an honor. I love the variety!

Relationships and connections with people feed my life and my writing. I did not know when I wrote each book that those themes laced their way through each work, hiding in a poem, a story, or my prose. Actually, taking the time to identify the tie between my six books opened my eyes! I’m so glad I wrote this blog to see the common tie that binds my work together. I have a feeling this meandering around and through my six books will help me in my future writing!

If you’ve read my books, did you see this theme? If not, did you see others? Let me know.

News, News, News!

A wintery day is an invitation to read! meme of five of my books
All available at my website: laradasbooks.com or Amazon.com

~For me, it’s Christmas all year long! Here’s a variety of Christmas greetings from Flippo & Neeca, featuring his song, “When It’s Christmas Time in Texas”: https://youtu.be/mpJCUGffU3A

Coronavirus Reflections: Bitter or Better?
Grab a cup of coffee and enjoy a chapter!

~My new book, Coronavirus Reflections: Bitter or Better? WON the 2022 New Mexico-Arizona Book Awards in the Body, Mind & Spirit Category. Have you bought your copy yet? Vist my website: laradasbooks.com or at Amazon.

Just Another Square Dance Caller: Authorized Biography of Marshall Flippo meme
Baby, it’s cold outside! Read about Flippo inside where it’s warm!

~Have you bought a copy of Flippo’s biography yet? Believe it or not—it’s been three years. Go here for your hardback or paperback: https://www.laradasbooks.com or at Amazon.