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After six months, I still can’t dance. My podiatrist and physical therapist agree, and on top of the nerve pain, not dancing’s killing me! Such despair! Here’s why!
Recently
Last night we dropped by the Sweetheart Dance at the Albuquerque Square Dance Center to see friends— I still can’t dance. I tuned out the music and the dancing on the floor and concentrated on talking to my friends. Such despair! Then today, we just spent the afternoon at the dance hall for the Annual Membership Meeting. I’m on the board that runs the dance hall. Afterwards a large group went out to Sadie’s for dinner and that delicious social time we all enjoy! I looked at people sitting around the table, seeing some who I have known for decades and some just a few years! But dear friends!
So why can’t I dance? The dog attack happened six months ago—the wound has healed! But the nerve damage persists. I have peroneal nerve damage that runs from my foot to my butt. A couple months ago, my podiatrist warned me if I got kicked in a square, I could erase all the work we done so far over the past few months to diminish the nerve pain. And because of the CRPS, Complex Regional Pain Syndrome, the pain could escalate and gets worse.
Then, my physical therapist told me last week when I questioned him about square dancing that I could injure my ankle with any rotating movement of the foot.
So, six months since the dog attack, I still can’t dance! If you don’t know me, you may be wondering why this one thing is so important to me.
Let my poetry answer the question:
“She Was Born Dancing!”
On June 26, 1953, my folks left their thirteen-month-old son with Millie, the family babysitter, to go to a square dance in Trinidad, fifty miles away.
Mom danced one tip that night— She was nine months pregnant with me. They left the dance early feeling something was about to happen.
Early the next morning Mom had labor pains that made her stagger across the floor. It was time!
The fifty-mile trip back to Trinidad and the hospital was made in record time. At 10:30 a.m. I was born.
Dad went downtown to buy cigars and ran into a fellow dancer from the previous night.
Dad announced his good news— a new baby girl!
Remembering Mom at the dance the night before, the only comment the stunned friend had to make was, “She was born dancing!”
Larada Horner-Miller, This Tumbleweed Landed, (Horner Publishing Company, 2014), 11-12.
So, I treasure my legacy—she was born dancing! The majority of my life has spun around dancing of some kind, and not dancing for SIX MONTHS has tortured me! Six months!
Here’s another poem describing how I feel when I dance:
Why We Square Dance—
Why I Dance
It’s a Friday night Or A Saturday night A dance night!
The week lasted for eons grueling I had my work face on for five days and I kept going. I finished this week Exhausted!
My family needs drained me I am welted and am ready to dissolve into bed!
But it’s my dance night. I breathe deeply, and I know!
I select my square dance outfit. What do I feel like tonight? Red or turquoise Southwest design or frilly lace?
The familiarity of my weekly routine takes over
Systematically I put on my outfit and as each layer goes on, my perspective and energy level changes! First my hose With a deep breath, I release part of my stress Then my pettipants Oh my, it’s going—another deep breath Then my top and skirt My goodness—a glimmer of hope Then my belt A smile slowly crosses my lips Next my matching petticoat and shoes Yes, I sigh with relief Finally, my club badge To identify who I am—
A square dancer!
A spray to finish my hair a touch of lipgloss A final look in the mirror A pirouette and a spin crinoline flowing I am complete! My exhaustion replaced with anticipation!
The drive to the dance hall becomes a time tunnel a vacuum a timeless space void of the demands of this world stress free relaxing
Either soft music in the background Or a compatible silence Or a casual conversation
A bridge between the world out there With its demands And the dance world With its pleasures!
Friends greet me as I enter the dance hall—my dance family The music starts I step onto the dance floor and I am free! The carefree child within me spins round and around claps her hands and Shouts for joy! I am free! The tip starts, and I am safe to spend two hours In sheer joy and ecstasy!
I drop the world’s cares and concerns, at the door, kicking them out of view!
So if you have problems in your world, join me and leave them at the door!
If you are angry or sad The magic begins when you show up and dress up! The music starts and I step onto the dance floor! And then the real magic takes over!
Cares melt down my shoulders and flitter away on a breath giving a lightness to my step Sorrows cluster together and ride away on an angel’s wings.
Music playing surrounded by dear friends I step onto the dance floor It is a safe place And I am free!
I love the preparation, the anticipation and then finally stepping on the dance floor, the music and the dance!
Finally,
I hope these words of mine in poetry form have expressed my deep love for dancing and square dancing specifically. And hopefully, you can sympathize with me for not dancing for SIX MONTHS! Yes, enduring the pain has been grueling, but this loss resonates in a different category!
The 18th Annual Hot August Nights Square and Round Dance Festival is over for another year and I saw collaboration at its best.
First,
The Hot August Nights event, from its inception, has been a collaboration of dancers who love to promote square and round dancing. The present-day committee for this event spans multi-states: New Mexico, Arizona, Virginia, Utah and Idaho. As the committee morphed and changed, we added this multi-state dimension and it has worked.
Second,
We have hired top-notch staff each year and have collaborated with them on a variety of aspects about the event, including them when their schedule allows to attend our Follow-up meeting on Sunday at the close of the festival. Listening to advice from national callers and cuers, we have changed our schedule, honed in on specific details of a successful festival and even changed the location of the logo on the front of our 10th annual t-shirt.
Third,
This year, we collaborated with a local square dance club, Duke City Square Dance Club, to provide a Recycle Shop for our event. We have done it ourselves for many years but gave it up after last year because it became too much of a time-consumer for the committee. When Duke City’s president asked if they could do a Recycle Shop, we agreed and it worked out smoothly.
Fourth,
Our staff this year (like so many other years) collaborated with us in a variety of ways. I had made a mistake on the schedule so Mitchell Thompson, our cuer, reminded me of some time changes we needed to do, and it worked out fine.
Friday night we made a schedule change for the Saturday afternoon square dance program, moving the “High Energy” from last event of the afternoon to start it. I didn’t change it on the website and we had local dancers who missed this fun activity because of the time change. Tony Oxendine graciously added another “High Energy” tip so those dancers had a test of that energetic dancing.
True collaboration works!
Last but not list,
Committee members collaborating!
The Hot August Nights committee is one of the best committees I’ve ever worked with, and this year I saw it in full action. Because of the dog attack wound I had, I couldn’t do my usual duties, so each one of the committee members took extra care to cover my duties, especially my husband, Lin. The event in my estimation hummed like a well-oiled machine.
Finally,
Dancers, staff and committee at Hot August Nights
Because of the many facets of collaboration, our dancers had a great time at this Hot August Nights. What a joy it was to see all the smiles, hear all the laughter and listen to Tony’s beautiful renditions of so many beloved songs and enjoy Mitchell’s cuing and Chelsea’s helpful spirit and beautiful dancing!
Update on My Dog Attack:
I went to the Wound Clinic on Thursday. The nurse specialist took off the scab and cleaned the wound thoroughly—OUCH!!!! Then he put on a compression bandage from my toes to my knee. The good news is—NO SKIN GRAFT!
Elevating My Leg A lot!
I tried to elevate my leg during the weekend festival as much as possible, but my ankle and foot kept swelling up—probably too much activity.
On Saturday night after listening to all the dances I wanted to jump up and do, with Lin on my left side and my cane on my right side, I did do a 30 second small-step version of a cha cha of “Irish Washer Woman” and cried because I couldn’t do very much!
The Wound Clinic nurse said I will see him weekly for five weeks, so I’ll see what I have ahead of me!
Podcasts & My Interviews
Listen to an interview released Wednesday, August 7, 2024 on Hump Days Calls podcast
“Meet Larada” I wrote in a workshop with Natalie Goldberg in 2002. I’m rummaging through old notebooks and journals for poetry for my new poetry book, and I found this one.
Meet Larada
Larada enjoying lunch in Spain
I am turquoise, red, hot pink
And purple, a kaleidoscope
Of color rearranging
Changing as the parts of
Me fall into place.
The turquoise reflects the
Peace and calm deep within me
Like the waters of the Mexican Caribbean.
The red in me ignites into a flame—
Passionate and energetic
but hot to touch.
The hot pink cries out
Notice me, I’m present—
You can’t ignore me
Anymore.
The purple states my power
That place inside me that has
Matured to womanhood
But still holds a girlish twinkle.
A waltz,
A jitterbug, a Swing Dance,
The Latin rhythm of rumba,
Or Bolero.
The depth of me express itself
In dance,
The spiritual connection to
The music,
The beat,
The magic and the sway!
The me totally revealed on
The dance floor,
Vulnerable,
Bare,
Connected to my partner
And me
And the song.
About This Poem
I love this poem because it shows the many sides of me, a multi-faceted personality. If you know anything about me, you know that dancing has been a major part of my life and I capture my passion here. Meet me in all the stanzas and their descriptions.
This is a short post this week because I’m exhausted—we danced all weekend at a festival here in Albuquerque and I’m tired with a smile on my face. Lots of laughter, saw old friends and made new ones—the side-benefits of dancing!
Who are you? Have you ever thought of you as a color(s)? Your favorite activity? Hopefully in reading this you meet me in different ways. Also, take the time to describe yourself in a variety of ways.
