Tag: Albuquerque Square Dance Center

After Six Month I Still Can’t Dance: Oh My God!
MY LIFE · My Thoughts · square dance

After Six Month I Still Can’t Dance: Oh My God!

Larada Horner-MillerLeave a comment
Despair - six months

After six months, I still can’t dance. My podiatrist and physical therapist agree, and on top of the nerve pain, not dancing’s killing me! Such despair! Here’s why!

Recently

Last night we dropped by the Sweetheart Dance at the Albuquerque Square Dance Center to see friends— I still can’t dance. I tuned out the music and the dancing on the floor and concentrated on talking to my friends. Such despair! Then today, we just spent the afternoon at the dance hall for the Annual Membership Meeting. I’m on the board that runs the dance hall. Afterwards a large group went out to Sadie’s for dinner and that delicious social time we all enjoy! I looked at people sitting around the table, seeing some who I have known for decades and some just a few years! But dear friends!

So why can’t I dance? The dog attack happened six months ago—the wound has healed! But the nerve damage persists. I have peroneal nerve damage that runs from my foot to my butt. A couple months ago, my podiatrist warned me if I got kicked in a square, I could erase all the work we done so far over the past few months to diminish the nerve pain. And because of the CRPS, Complex Regional Pain Syndrome, the pain could escalate and gets worse.

Then, my physical therapist told me last week when I questioned him about square dancing that I could injure my ankle with any rotating movement of the foot.

So, six months since the dog attack, I still can’t dance! If you don’t know me, you may be wondering why this one thing is so important to me.

Let my poetry answer the question:

“She Was Born Dancing!”

On June 26, 1953, my folks left
their thirteen-month-old son with Millie, 
     the family babysitter,
to go to a square dance in Trinidad, 
     fifty miles away. 

Mom danced one tip that night— 
She was nine months pregnant 
     with me.
They left the dance early 
     feeling something was about to happen. 

Early the next morning 
Mom had labor pains 
     that made her stagger across the floor. 
It was time! 

The fifty-mile trip back to Trinidad 
     and the hospital
     was made in record time. 
At 10:30 a.m. I was born. 

Dad went downtown to buy cigars 
     and ran into a fellow dancer 
     from the previous night. 

Dad announced his good news— 
     a new baby girl! 

Remembering Mom at the dance 
     the night before, 
the only comment the stunned friend 
     had to make was, 
“She was born dancing!”

Larada Horner-Miller, This Tumbleweed Landed, (Horner Publishing Company, 2014), 11-12.

So, I treasure my legacy—she was born dancing! The majority of my life has spun around dancing of some kind, and not dancing for SIX MONTHS has tortured me! Six months!

Here’s another poem describing how I feel when I dance:

Lin and I dancing at Texas Stampede, Dallas, TX - six months

Why We Square Dance—

Why I Dance
It’s a Friday night
	Or
		A Saturday night
A dance night!

The week lasted for eons
	grueling
I had my work face on for five days
	and I kept going.
I finished this week
	Exhausted!

My family needs drained me
I am welted	
	and
		am ready to dissolve into bed!

But it’s my dance night.
	I breathe deeply,
		and I know!

I select my square dance outfit.
	What do I feel like tonight?
		Red or turquoise
			Southwest design or frilly lace?

The familiarity of my weekly routine
	takes over

Systematically I put on my outfit
	and
		as each layer goes on,
			my perspective and energy level changes!
First my hose
	With a deep breath, I release part of my stress
Then my pettipants
	Oh my, it’s going—another deep breath
Then my top and skirt
	My goodness—a glimmer of hope
Then my belt
	A smile slowly crosses my lips
Next my matching petticoat and shoes
	Yes, I sigh with relief
Finally, my club badge
	To identify who I am—
	
	A square dancer!

A spray to finish my hair
	a touch of lipgloss
A final look in the mirror
A pirouette and a spin
	crinoline flowing
		I am complete!
My exhaustion replaced with anticipation!

The drive to the dance hall
	becomes a time tunnel
		a vacuum
			a timeless space
				void of the demands of this world
					stress free 
						relaxing

Either soft music in the background
	Or
		a compatible silence
	Or
		a casual conversation

A bridge between the world out there
	With its demands
And the dance world
	With its pleasures!

Friends greet me as I enter the dance hall—my dance family
The music starts
I step onto the dance floor
	and I am free!
		The carefree child within me
			spins round and around
				claps her hands
					and 
						Shouts for joy!
						I am free!
							The tip starts,
						and I am safe
						to spend two hours 
							In sheer joy and ecstasy!

I drop the world’s cares and concerns,
	at the door,
		kicking them out of view!

So if you have problems in your world, join me
	and
		leave them at the door!

If you are angry or sad
	The magic begins
		when you show up
			and
				dress up!
	The music starts
		and
		I step onto the dance floor!
And then the real magic takes over!

Cares melt down my shoulders
	and flitter away on a breath
		giving a lightness to my step
Sorrows cluster together
	and ride away on an angel’s wings.

Music playing
	surrounded by dear friends
I step onto the dance floor
	It is a safe place
		And
			I am free!

That’s why I dance!

Copyright © 2015 Larada Horner-Miller

I love the preparation, the anticipation and then finally stepping on the dance floor, the music and the dance!

Finally,

I hope these words of mine in poetry form have expressed my deep love for dancing and square dancing specifically. And hopefully, you can sympathize with me for not dancing for SIX MONTHS! Yes, enduring the pain has been grueling, but this loss resonates in a different category!

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Our 12th Anniversary: What a Crazy Day!
Dancing · Friends · My Thoughts · square dance

Our 12th Anniversary: What a Crazy Day!

Larada Horner-MillerLeave a comment
Lin & Larada Kissing - 12th Anniversary

Our 12th anniversary—today—and what a crazy day we had! It started off great, but the afternoon took a horrible turn!

Twelve years ago, today, October 22, 2011, Lin and I married at the Albuquerque Square Dance Center, surrounded by nearly 300 friends and family. We had a short lovely ceremony and a big dance party with square dancing, round dancing and couple dancing! Today we started our anniversary off dancing at the Trail Out dance to end a wonderful weekend with Dee Dee Dougherty-Lottie calling.

After everyone sang “Happy Anniversary” this morning, Dee Dee played a fun-loving waltz that felt more like a polka during one break, and we waltz-polkaed to it. Then Jerry Gilbreath surprised us during another break by singing George Strait’s “I Cross My Heart.” What’s the significance of this song?

At our wedding, I had written a poem for Lin and read it. Lin knew I was writing a poem and responded to my poem with one of my favorites! Wow! What a treat for Jerry to remember and sing it today.

After the morning dance ended, we headed home. On the drive in to Albuquerque in the morning, we saw a major accident on the eastbound lane of I-40, but we thought it would be taken care of by our return trip! NO!! As a fatal accident, it kept the interstate closed for hours!

Then we tried to figure the best way up the canyon home. See, there’s two ways to go: I-40 or old Route 66. Using Google, we found out I-40 eastbound was still closed, so we went by Cost Co and got gas, then headed up Central. I jumped out of the Jeep to grab a drink at Taco Bell for the possibly long trip home. So, by this time—after noon—we went up Route 66, surrounded by semi-trucks and cars at almost a standstill.

What added to my frustration? The Denver Broncos’ game began at 2:25 PM, and I couldn’t get it on Sirius radio or on the Internet. A friend texted me updates about the Broncos’ game, so I had an idea about what was going on.

About four hours later, and some movement up Route 66, we found out another incident added to our delay—a downed power pole across the road. So a state patrolman told us to turn around—finally I-40 was open.

Finally, we got home at 4:30 PM after spending most of the afternoon in the car, inching our way towards home.

So, I ran out of time to do my blog about our trip to Germany. Instead, here’s the poem I wrote for Lin and read to him at our wedding. I hope you enjoy it.

Larada Reading her poem to Lin!
Larada reading her poem to Lin! 12th Anniversary
Close up of Larada reading her poem to Lin!

It’s Here!

Larada Horner 

It's here!
Our life together starts toda

The past is behind us
The future looms positively in our view!

I have labored over the words to say to you.
How do I find words to describe what has happened 
Between us

There is not a container to hold it 

We come from 2 rich, full lives 
	a small town New Jersey boy and
	a country girl from Colorado
Other places, other times
Other husbands, other wives

We arrive here today
From tragedy 
The loss of Kathi
Your dear former wife
And My dear friend

We arrive here today
From joy
In our newfound relationship,
Having been friends for years!
I knew you and liked you before
I fell in love with you!

Thank you for proposing to me
On Christmas morning, 2010
In front of Mom and Aunt Willie, 
My 92-year-old aunt 
and 
making It official.

When You met My Dear Uncle Tanky 
After you proposed, he took me aside 
And said he's the best!

I agree - I have no doubt!

Many of our friends here today have 
Told us that they will be glad when we get married,
So, we would stop kissing and hugging each other
All the time!

I will never stop!
Each kiss and each hug heals my soul at a deeper level
I want more!

Lin, to me
You are a cool mountain breeze
Deer stopping by for nourishment & comfort!
You are laughter!  Every Wednesday night at round dancing 
when you refer to the foxtrot as the F word, 
I laugh deeply!

I know that the life we will start today 
Is rich
blessed
And oh, so good!

As I look out over
Our family and friends,
I know we have the support
And power to make this marriage
Become a fascinating adventure.

Today we become husband and wife
And some of you may wonder
"why?"
At our age.

Here's my reason -
I wanted to stand today before
My family and friends and God and profess my love to you.
To me the sacrament of marriage 
Has a different value today!
I wanted the protection for us
That marriage offers.

I commit today 
To be Larada
Creative, messy, wacky and fun!

I ask you to be Lin.
Creative, neat, linear and goofy!

Together we form a "we"
That's dynamic!

I could site a long list of thank you’s today, but I want to 
thank you mostly for one thing - choosing to
Share the rest of your 
Life with me!  It's here!
My mom and brother gave me away! What a joyful day it was! 12th Anniversary
My mom and brother gave me away! What a joyful day it was!

Finally, our 12th anniversary will be memorable for sure, but even though the afternoon was grueling, Lin and I celebrated this day and each other! We marveled at how much we’ve packed into these twelve years and what lies ahead of us!

TWO GREAT DEALS:

Hair on Fire: A Heartwarming & Humorous Christmas Memoir - My Jesse

Measure the Success of a New Festival
My Thoughts · square dance

Measure the Success of a New Festival

Larada Horner-Miller1 Comment
Gary Shoemake, Jerry Gilbreath & Ken Bower at April Showers Festival
Gary Shoemake, Jerry Gilbreath & Ken Bower at April Showers Festival

How do you measure the success of a festival? I just attended a new square and round dance festival in Albuquerque, New Mexico—April Showers, and I know beyond any doubt it was a success. Why?

My feet ache, my face hurts from laughing so much and my heart sings! All these signs indicated a smashing success. In a post-COVID world, numbers of dancers are smaller. Some people are still wary about coming out to dance. The Albuquerque Square Dance Center requires dancers to be vaccinated, so that kept some at home. But many came out to forget the worries of this world and dance!

We found out this morning during some story telling, Ken Bower, Gary Shoemake and Bob and Sally Nolen started their calling and cuing careers in Albuquerque in the early 70s at Summer Sounds, a successful square and round dance festival that continued for nearly twenty years and was the predecessors to Hot August Nights, a festival I help run that is still going today. So, Jerry and Mary Beth Gilbreath thought up the idea of a new festival and the other four agreed wholeheartedly; thus April Showers was born.

During the weeks before the event, I wondered if we’d get enough dancers to have it. The registrations trickled in, but I continued to promote it and other upcoming festivals on Facebook, hoping to stir up interest.

Finally, Friday came, and it was a go—our first festival in over two years. After showering, I blew my hair dry and put on my makeup, which has become quite a chore after not doing it for two years. I donned my beautiful square dance outfit, dressing in matching outfits to promote our next festival. I added matching pettipants and a fluffy slip that makes my dress stand out! Square dance outfits overflow with energy in their beauty, swirling with every movement.

The event began. When we arrived Friday night, I looked around the hall and choked up—I knew so many of the dancers from other events, especially Fun Valley RV Resort in Colorado and felt blessed to be back doing what I love—dancing.

Immediately, I noticed the high energy level—no sour faces, no negative words, just an amiable group celebrating life after two years of no festivals. Yes, the size of the crowd wasn’t as big as before the pandemic, but the dancers’ commitment to having a good time enlarged the size.

We danced Friday night away to our three favorite callers and two dear cuers. The evening was over before I knew it!

Here’s a video of dancing Friday night: https://youtu.be/OZ1MSbHDkgU

When Lin and I got home, we reviewed the night, laughing at the fun parts. I had trouble sleeping because of the heightened adrenaline level.

Saturday, we started again at 10:30 am although we missed the round dance workshop at 9:00 am. We live about twenty miles from Albuquerque and had to decide just how much of the weekend we could do, so we gave up the round dance workshop. We did the mainstream workshop and enjoyed the fun the callers did by workshopping some different moves.

For lunch, we joined two other couples and enjoyed the one-on-one conversation and exchange. I realized this is what we missed so much during the pandemic—the sharing of our lives and the laughter. These times over meals over the years have solidified relationships with so many friends from all over the country. After two years’ absence, I felt connected again.

Then we missed the Introduction to Round dancing but took part in the Plus workshop. Afterwards we drove home, enjoyed a brief nap and dressed and returned for the evening dance.

Again, I dressed in matching outfits to promote another square dance event coming up in Albuquerque. I had the surprise of my life when I walked in the dance hall and the cuer and his wife who taught me to round dance had come down to the hall for the evening with a square dance legend from years ago. What a joy to see these three precious friends from the past.

The Saturday night dance overflowed with laughter and energy again, yet more revved up than Friday night. Square dance dresses swirled around the floor. I saw so many smiles, so many people relaxed and enjoying themselves. Some square dance shenanigans happened like scatter promenades and one wild square where the original square was joined by many others walking through the square and joining in. I never laughed so hard. We ended the evening with ice cream sundaes and two-stepping to Jerry Gilbreath’s gorgeous renditions of some of my favorite country music standards.

As if that’s not enough, we returned this morning (Sunday) at 10:00 am for two more hours of dancing fun. Sunday mornings traditionally in Albuquerque are filled with a lot of insane scatter promenades and “Air Raids.” This morning continued the traditions.

So what is the measure of a successful festival? Does the number of squares determine it? We had seven to eight—small compared to pre-COVID standards. How about the smiles, the laughter, the total release from any cares or concerns? I measure the success by those things too, especially in today’s world.

Thank you Gary, Ken, Jerry, Bob and Sally for a successful first April Showers festival. I look forward to next year’s continuation of this wonderful tradition.

Finally, here’s a quote by Bell Hooks that caught my eye: “The choice to love is the choice to connect—to find ourselves in the other.” I felt so connected this weekend and that’s another measure of success!

How do you measure the success of a festival, pre-COVID? I’d be interested!

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Our Ten Year Anniversary—Really?
Life Lessons · My Thoughts · square dance

Our Ten Year Anniversary—Really?

Larada Horner-Miller2 Comments
Lin & Larada - wedding picture - ten years ago
Lin & Larada, Wedding Day, 2011

Ten years of marriage—how time flies! On Friday, October 22, 2021, Lin and I celebrated our tenth anniversary. That number shocks me—it’s hard to believe it’s been ten years!

How We Got Together

In 2008, I divorced my third husband and adjusted to being single again. I jumped into Single Square Dancers USA (SSDUSA), becoming vice-president in 2009, president in 2010, and past president in 2011. When I signed on in 2009, I knew I had made a three-year commitment. My renewed involvement helped me handle my recent divorce.

In 2009, Lin’s wife, Kathi, died from reoccurring cancer. She was my best girlfriend in square dancing. She and Lin and my ex and I had danced, traveled and played card games together for several years.

After Kathi passed away in November, and in December, a friend of ours set Lin and me up to dance together at a holiday dance. After the first of the year, Lin called and asked if I’d like to dance with him at the weekly dances in Albuquerque. At this point, I was tired of dancing by myself round dancing (cued ballroom dancing) or dancing the guy part in square dances, so I agreed to it.

As time went on, we enjoyed the dancing and our time together, and realized there could be more. Cautiously, we moved forward and our relationship grew. So, Christmas Day 2010, Lin proposed to me in front of my mom and my aunt Willie, and I readily accepted with, “Yes!”

How We Scheduled Our Wedding

In 2010, I held the position of president of Single Square Dancers USA and faced being the recent past president in 2011. SSDUSA held their yearly festival and business meeting annually over Labor Day weekend. So, when we started talking about a wedding day, it had to be after Labor Day, 2011, so I could finish my three-year commitment.

To give us some breathing room, we set our big day for October 22, 2011, and it had to be a square and round dance event!

How We Ended Up with over 250 Attendees

So, for the entire year of 2011, after Lin proposed, Lin invited everyone to come to our wedding at any square dance we attended around the country. We did not know how many to plan for when we finally got down to ordering our cake and reception supplies. The Albuquerque Square Dance Center limits its attendance to 299. We hoped we would stay within that requirement, and we did!

How Our Wedding Unfolded

Lin, Marya (minister who married us), Larada, 2011
Lin, Marya (minister who married us), Larada, 2011

Lin and I both had been married before, so my Episcopalian priest couldn’t marry us, but he offered to do our pre-marriage counseling. So, we searched online and found the perfect person to do the ceremony, Marya. She encouraged us to help create the ceremony and our vows. I included some recovery verbiage, and it became our own. We wanted a brief ceremony, leaving the rest of the afternoon for the reception, party and dance time.

The Bridal Party, 2011 - Ten years ago
The Bridal Party, 2011

For Lin’s best men, he asked two dance friends who were like brothers to him. I asked eleven women to be my maids/matrons of honor, women from all the different areas of my life.

When it came to my dress, I wanted only one woman to make it—Mary Jo Smith who had made our catchy Hot August Nights’ outfits, and me several other outfits. I bought the material here in Albuquerque, sent it to her in Virginia and she did her magic!

We selected Pastian’s Bakery for our wedding cake, another “must.” What a gorgeous cake they made, and Sheri, the owner’s daughter and dear friend, helped create a fun sports focused groom’s cake.

Another friend, Nicole Tagart, took the gorgeous pictures for us, and Sharon McCafferty agreed to video-tape it at the last minute.

How Our Wedding Day Went

My brother, Lin, Larada & Mom, 2011
My brother, Lin, Larada & Mom, 2011

My mom and brother gave me away, and we walked in with Train’s song, “Marry Me” playing. I wrote a poem for Lin and shared it, and he played a George Strait song, “I Cross My Heart,” for me. Afterwards, we cut the cake and did the traditional cake eating and drink exchange. Then the dancing began.

Lin & Larada Round Dancing, 2011 - Ten years ago
Lin & Larada Round Dancing, 2011

During the reception/party, we had square dancing, round dancing and country western. What a grand party it was! We had three square dance callers: Jerry Gilbreath, Joey Solis and Art Tangen. Shirley and Don Underwood did the rounds for us, and Scott Amspoker played country and western dance music.

Afterwards, a group of us went out to dinner at Monroe’s on Osuna. We noticed the absence of Tom and Dottie Doherty, dance friends from Colorado, but figured they decided not to come. Afterwards, we brought the group up to Lin’s house in the mountains to see his mountain hideaway.

We gathered our bags and drove to the Bottger Mansion, a bed-and-breakfast in Old Town, for our wedding night. What a memorable time we had. After a delicious gourmet breakfast the next morning, Lin drove me to my townhouse to see my brother off to the airport, and we planned to pick up my mom and go out to his house.

Suddenly, our plans changed. Tom and Dottie, who were supposed to join us for dinner, were t-boned in an accident, coming to the restaurant to join us the night before. Dottie’s injuries weren’t too bad, but Tom was severely hurt. So, we took my brother to the airport, then picked up Dottie and took her to the hospital to see Tom. Mom and I ended up staying at my townhouse for two weeks to help Dottie get to the hospital to take care of Tom and provide emotional support for her.

How We Filled Ten Years

After that glorious day, Lin and I filled the following precious ten years with dancing around the United States, traveling here in the United States and abroad on cruises, tours and with friends. At home, Lin created a gorgeous flower garden, dedicating many hours to it. I have self-published six books and three cookbooks. We savored our full rich life, and time quickly passed.

Ten Years Later—How We Celebrated our Tenth Anniversary

Lin & Larada, Ten Years Later, 2021

On Friday, October 22, 2021, the actual date of our wedding, we had photos taken to commemorate the day like we did for our fifth anniversary on our Panama Canal cruise. After the photo shot, we had dinner at Chili’s and came home and watched the video of our wedding—I shed a few tears.

Then on Saturday, October 23, 2021, because the Bottger Mansion was so special to us ten years ago, we spent the night there to celebrate our tenth anniversary. We wanted the 22nd, but it wasn’t available. To enjoy the area, we drove to Albuquerque about 2:00 pm to check in early. Then we shopped around Old Town, enjoying our favorite old haunts and seeing the sad effect the pandemic has had on restaurants and shops there. For dinner, we ate at the Church Street Café. A Mexican music group serenaded us while we ate. To end our time at the Bottger, we enjoyed a gourmet breakfast and came home.

Whew! Ten wonderful years later, we looked back and relished our time together. Now we look to the next ten and the adventures ahead of us.

How long have you been married? How do you celebrate those milestone anniversaries? (Scroll below to share your comments!)

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