Independent Press Awards is proud to announce the 2018 Distinguished Favorites in the Memoir category: A Time to Grow Up: A Daughter’s Grief Memoir. See the listing at the URL below;
Check out Appendix D in my grief memoir, A Time to Grow Up: A Daughter’s Grief Memoir for healing activities and ideas.
APPENDIX D – Workbook
Healing from grief requires active participation if you want to get past the pain and the loss to the other side—to thrive more than just survive. Here are a few questions and activities to get the juices flowing after reading this book.
1. List the key people you have lost in your life and write out a short description of your relationship besides the name of each person. How did that loss affect you? How old were you? How did you handle your grief at the time? What did you learn about your grief process?
2. How do you feel about grief after reading this book? What do you know about grief? Where could you find more information about grief?
3. If applicable: how did your mother grieve the loss of her parents? How did your father grieve the loss of his parents? Which one are you more like? Write down three take-aways you learned from your parents about how to grieve.
4. What resources do you have available when you lose a loved one? (Example: Friends, church, social support group, etc.) Write down names, phone numbers,and email addresses to have available.
5. Be diligent about the following areas of your life because grief affects the whole person. Identify one activity you can do to take care of yourself in each of these areas:
Physical —
Emotional—
Spiritual —
6. Buy a journal and/or adult coloring book and colored pencils/crayons and draw your feelings. Use this as a journal and dedicate time often to color and then describe the drawing.
7. Buy a journal and write three pages (“Morning Pages” from Julia Cameron’s The Artist‘sWay) every morning. Just start writing and see what comes up.
8. Create a sacred time and place every day to cry. Mark it on your calendar: when and where, and be dedicated about keeping that time.
9. Get involved in a grief support group in your area. Examples: GriefShare, hospice, religious groups, Yoga, etc.
10. Look at Appendix A and start a “God Things” list for what you are going through right now. Be sure not to leave out what seems small and insignificant.
11. Look at Appendix B and identify the normal activities you do that soothe your soul and then add activities to support your grief process.
12. Look at Appendix C and select one book to add to your library and read it. Search the topic “grief” online and add any titles below that appeal to you.
13. On the first anniversary of your loved one’s death, plan ahead to be prepared and make it a special day for you.
Share below activities/ideas that worked for you. We’re all different, and I’d love to know what you have done to heal after a major loss in your life.
Our family met at the train station in Bury St. Edmund’s and rode the train to Cambridge–about a 45 minute trip. I loved looking at the lush green countryside as we whizzed by.
Train Station in Bury St. Edmund’s
On the train ride, we passed by Newmarket, famous for “Newmarket has over fifty horse training stables, two large racetracks, the Rowley Mile and the July Course and one of the most extensive and prestigious horse training grounds in the world.”
This was exciting for me to see–a country girl at heart!
After we arrived in Cambridge, a group of us walked to the main part of Cambridge and others rode the bus. Seeing all the beautiful buildings as we walked was awesome. Again as in Oxford, there were bikes everywhere.
Bikes–The Preferred Means of Transportation
Look at how narrow the streets are!
Narrow Streets
Cambridge is made up of several colleges, like Oxford.
Here’s Trinity College:
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We continued our walk and saw other colleges along the way. Then part of our group decided go “punting.”
Our Group Punting
“A punt is a flat-bottomed boat with a square-cut bow, designed for use in small rivers or other shallow water. Punting refers to boating in a punt. The punter generally propels the punt by pushing against the river bed with a pole. A punt should not be confused with a gondola, a shallow draft vessel that is structurally different, and which is propelled by an oar rather than a pole.”
“The River Cam runs through the heart of Cambridge enabling you to enjoy fantastic views of the world famous Cambridge College ‘Backs’ from the comfort of a traditional Cambridge Punt.”
While the group was punting, Lin, my cousin Meghan and I roamed around Cambridge and had a delicious lunch.
When the group got back together, part of us did a walking tour of Cambridge and saw more of the colleges: King’s College, Corpus Christi College, and Christ’s Church College. We were across the river from Christ’s Church College–what a spectacular view!
Christ’s Church College
The tour guide told us that Steve Hawkings was often seen around Cambridge, and I would have loved to see him, but we didn’t. We did see Claire College and Trinity College a second time. We also saw St. John’s College. We ended the tour with the historic Church of the Holy Sepulchre, known as the Round Church, and was built in 1130.
The Church of the Holy Sepulchre
After a stop at a pub along the way for refreshment and relaxation, we walked back to the train station and made it back to Bury St. Edmund’s safely. What a memorable day in Cambridge!
Wow! It’s been over a month since I blogged–please forgive me! Life got in the way.
I had been anticipating Stonehenge for the whole trip because it was one of my favorite destinations on our list. So, it was up early again, a walk down the crowded escalator to get to the Tube, on to Victoria Station and breakfast at the Starbuck’s.
Realizing our tour bus was a double-decker, we watched as the first people out the door pushed, shoved and rushed upstairs to the top level. When we approached the bus, Lin and I ducked inside the lower level and landed the front seat on the left side with lots of leg room, a spacious window to see out at eye-level, and our own shelf to put our bags and drinks. We lucked out!
The tour guide, John, noted famous sights as we drove through and out of London. He had a great sense of humor and was knowledgeable. The two hour drive took us out into the English lush countryside again.
Now about Stonehenge:
“Stonehenge is a prehistoricmonument in Wiltshire, England, 2 miles (3 km) west of Amesbury. It consists of a ring of standing stones, with each standing stone around 13 feet (4.0 m) high, 7 feet (2.1 m) wide and weighing around 25 tons. The stones are set within earthworks in the middle of the most dense complex of Neolithic and Bronze Age monuments in England, including several hundred burial mounds.[1]
Archaeologists believe it was constructed from 3000 BC to 2000 BC. The surrounding circular earth bank and ditch, which constitute the earliest phase of the monument, have been dated to about 3100 BC. Radiocarbon dating suggests that the first bluestones were raised between 2400 and 2200 BC,[2] although they may have been at the site as early as 3000 BC.[3][4][5]”
Driving into to the Stonehenge Visitors Center, we passed fields and cattle grazing–not what I’d thought I’d see near Stonehenge. John encouraged us to use the self-guided tour provided. We had limited time, so we used the bathroom, got on the shuttle and dashed to the site.
My first sighting of Stonehenge sent a shiver down my spine–I was standing near one of the wonders of the world. The layout of the self-guided tour and the walkway around Stonehenge was circular, starting at a distance from the back of the stones.
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I took tons of pictures with my camera and my iPhone. Here’s one of my favorites:
Me Touching Stonehenge
We enjoyed watching young adults set themselves up so that their photos looked like they were touching Stonehenge so we tried it.
Front Side Close
We listened to the audio, took more pictures and moved in closer on the front side. The information shared on the audio was informative.
Because we had spent as much time as possible at the stones, we rushed to get back to the tour bus and didn’t have any time to shop for souvenirs–OH, NO! It broke my heart not to have a t-shirt or hat with the Stonehenge logo on it, but the pictures I took became my souvenirs.
From there we drove to Bath, seeing thatched roofs and a patchwork quilt of green and gold fields.
Crystal Palace in Bath
We ate lunch at the Crystal Palace.
People congregated in the square in front of the Bath Abbey.
We did a walking tour at 2:30 pm with John. I had dressed in my rain coat but Lin didn’t, so he left us when the rain started. There was a downpour but we kept touring. My rain coat kept my camera and wool sweater dry, but my capris, socks and shoes were soaked.
Lin and I met back up–me totally soaked and him dry and looking sheepish.
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At 3:30 pm we did a self-guided tour of the Roman Baths. Again we had to rush because of time restraints. On our walk back to the bus, Lin found ice cream and we saw Ann-Marie, our tour guide for Stratford. I gave her a quick hug.
We had a two hour drive back to London–a relaxing drive. I love our drive through the English countryside.
There were several stops a long the way to let passengers off, and we were the last off the coach at Victoria Station. We rode the Tube back towards our hotel and received a refund from Oyster Card for four pounds. After a leisure walk towards our hotel, we ate dinner at The Swan, a local restaurant and shared Fish and Chips.
I spent that evening repacking my suitcase and surprised Lin that everything fit. This day ended our week in London. The next day we would pick up our rental car and drive to Bury St. Edmunds for my cousin’s wedding.
Have you seen Stonehenge? Bath? the Roman Baths? What was your experience? I would love to hear about your experience.
Independent Press Awards is proud to announce the 2018 Distinguished Favorites in the Memoir category: A Time to Grow Up: A Daughter’s Grief Memoir. See the listing at the URL below;
