I love focusing on women in my life during National Women’s History Month, and I end with Lela Kaye, my sister-in-law—a woman to celebrate. Cancer took her way to young—fifty years old!
Lela’s History
Lela grew up in Des Moines, New Mexico, a mere twenty-five miles from my hometown of Branson, Colorado, yet we didn’t know each other in school. She was a year younger, and I have no idea why we never met then. Our schools played each other in sports. As a junior-high girl, I idolized her two older sisters who were cheerleaders for Des Moines—they were gorgeous. But Lela never entered the cheerleading or sports world.
My Brother and Lela
Fast forward to the end of my senior year. Lela and my brother met at a dance and fell in love. In the midst of their young love, he got drafted at the end of the Vietnam War. It was 1972 and a different world! My parents tried to fight the draft. They never thought he’d be drafted—probably ringing off of my dad never being drafted for his breathing issues. My dad and brother both had asthma, but nonetheless, the Army took my brother away.
The draft complicated things for this young couple. So, they married October 21, 1972 and off they went to Fort Leonard Wood, Missouri, a world away from both families. They had their first child there. Lela’s mom, Mom and I were there for her birth. Lela, the young mother, facing the birth of her first child, never batted an eye. In fact, she humored me the night before the birth because her baby was doing somersaults in the womb wanting to come out, and she let me place my hand on her enlarged belly and feel her baby bouncing around inside. I was mesmerized!
Lela and Me
Over the years, Lela and I became fast friends and sisters. One year at the Branson-Trinchera Reunion, Reu Waldroup, a lifelong friend commented about our raucous laughter before the Saturday night dance, “Hey, I want what those two are drinking.” Funniest thing—we hadn’t had a drop to drink!
She welcomed me into their home anytime I visited with open arms. We spent countless hours laughing and laughing, sometimes at something only we could understand. Also, we spent countless hours sharing our faith.
On several New Year’s Eve visits, we sprayed our hair with glitter and we became known as “The Glitter Girls” at the local bars they frequented, and we enjoyed our short-lived fame. I loved to see my brother and Lela country and western dance—smooth and fun-loving!
Throughout the years, Lela and my brother shared their three children with me, knowing my heartbreak from not having any children myself.
Lela’s End
When Lela faced cancer twice, my heart broke as I watched her battle and battle long distance.
In September 2001, Lela bounced back quickly from her first cancer surgery to attend her son’s wedding. Mom had gone out early to participate in the pre-wedding fun activities. So, Mom was there with my brother and Lela on September 11. I was so glad she wasn’t alone at home to face that horrible day. Then I traveled out to witness the wedding. Lela looked gorgeous as the mother-of-the-groom, but I know she felt less than her normal self.
In September 2003 we planned a special celebration for Mom’s 75th birthday and did it in California because my brother and Lela’s children and grandchildren lived there. Lela arose to the occasion and participated totally. What a great time we had!
Lela and I shared such intimate parts of our lives. The cancer had metastasized and eaten up vertebrae in her back. She took me into the bathroom to show me how that had “dimpled” her. Yes, she could still laugh.
My ex-husband and I visited them in 2004, and the cancer had taken its toll on her. When Lela died in July 2005, our world was rocked.
What Lela Gave Me
As I’ve written this celebration of her life, I have pondered her influence in my life, even though she left us twenty years ago. Lela made me laugh—she had that off-handed humor that I’ve only shared with a very few people in my life. Sometimes we just looked at each other and cracked up—it felt like an inside joke!
She saw me go through some tough times in my life and never judged me—I knew she loved me just as I was! That was it—I could be totally Larada with her and know that I would be accepted.
I have had the pleasure of sharing in her three children’s lives, their children and grandchildren. In reality, these are my only children! Her legacy continues through each of them.
Yes, Lela Kaye brought a ton of memories to me in her short fifty years I will cherish the rest of my life! Not a sister by blood, but by choice!
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